Summer love
by TreeLeaf
Summary: AU. Summary: Sakura always loved Syaoran. But when Syaoran married her cousin Misha she was heartbroken. Time passed and Syaoran has become a widow with a child. He meets Sakura by coincidence. What will happen? July 2007: Continued again.
1. chapter 1

A/N 2007: I made some minor adjustments in this chapter. Biggest change would be the 2 names: Chelsea and Marc into Chiharu and Takashi

Disclaimer: I don't own CCS

**Chapter 1**

"You want to sell it?" Sakura turned around, facing her friend Mei Lin. She had just finished modeling for Tomoyo. Perplexed, she looked at her friend. "So if I refuse to go and spend the vacation there at Cherry's Lake you'll sell it?"

"Exactly" Mei Lin nodded her head.

"But it has been ours ever since we became friends! You can't just sell it like that!" Tomoyo put in. Getting up from her chair, Mei Lin dodged the with fabric sprawled over tables and went to the window that looked out to the busy streets of Tomoeda. The sun shone on her jet-black hair giving it a soft silver look. The shadow that fell over her face and the soft smile that played around her lips softened the hard look she had in her eyes.

That's true yes, and I won't deny it," she said, "but you never go there anymore. And me?" she shrugged, "I don't like going there all by myself."

Sakura frowned. " I can't stand the thought of people other than us living in that little cottage you bought." She said thoughtfully. "Very well. I haven't been there since a few years back-"

"Eight whole years!" Mei Lin said turning from the window and pointing her finger accusingly in Sakura's face.

"You haven't been there in eight years! Not since that thing with Syao-"

"Not since the summer when Chiharu and Takashi came home from France, for the funeral of his father!" Sakura interrupted. "I was seventeen back then." Sakura felt her cheeks glowing and walked to Tomoyo's latest design to get her composure back. When she turned around, she was her old self again. "You're right." She gave her a soft smile. "That's been eight years a go." For a second she wondered, not for the first time, if Mei Lin knew what happened that summer. She did hear something, Sakura was convinced of that. After all it was Mei Lin who found her there, crying on the sand, upset after the terrible way Li Syaoran had yelled at her.

"You know what I want?" she heard Tomoyo say, " I would like for us to go to the house this weekend. Then you two can decide to keep the cottage. If not we can keep a yard sale. Of course I'll be coming along with Eriol and stay in the house next to yours."

"But do you even have time?" Sakura asked, paling at the thought that Eriol would be there too. "And how am I going to fit it in my schedule?"

"Oh, I've got enough time," Tomoyo said rolling up the fabrics, "and as for you Sakura, I'll just give you the weekend off. I can reschedule the fashion show that was supposed to be this weekend."

"Well... I don't know..."

"Very well. I'll sell the cottage right away then..." Mei Lin's voice faltered. She shook her head and went back to her seat to sit down again.

Sakura didn't know what to do. She knew Mei Lin didn't want to sell the cottage, but she also knew that Mei Lin wanted to get her out of her busy life that she was leading. And Mei Lin would do anything to get her way.

Sakura sighed. She refused to listen to the little voice inside her head that was warning her and said: "Fine, I'll go."

Mei Lin was jumping for joy. She did it again! Again everything went the way she planned and she hugged Sakura.

"Thanks, Sakura." She beamed and looked over Sakura's shoulder at Tomoyo. "You will bring Eriol won't you?" she asked. Sakura paled once again at hearing Eriol's name, but no one noticed.

"Of course. And the little ones too." Tomoyo replied.

"Great! It will be like the old days, you'll see." And with that Mei Lin walked out of Tomoyo's office leaving an excited Tomoyo and a depressed Sakura.

'No,' Sakura thought, when she saw Mei Lin leaving, 'Nothing is gonna be like the old days. Misha and Eriol made sure of that.'

* * *

"How much further is it?" Hao Li's voice sounded sullen. 

"A few miles, if I'm not mistaken." Syaoran Li casted a sideways glance at his 7 year old son, who sat in the passenger's seat, next to him in the jeep. He could see that his son was tired. He had bags under his eyes, his hair was a messy brown, just like his father's, and he was sulking.

"Are you tired?" he asked softly.

"Tired? From what dad? We spend 2 hours at the airport, then another 2 hours at the customhouse. Then another hour in a traffic jam till we were out of town Right now it's..." the boy looked at his watch, "10 minutes past midnight. Why should I be tired?"

Syaoran almost snapped at his son because of the sarcasm in his words, but he managed to restrain himself. This was not the time to lecture his son. He was already going through a tough time with the death of his mother. So he decided a little vacation to the beach cottage in Tomoeda that he owned would do the both of them well. Yes, he still owned that cottage. He once promised to Misha that he would keep it so that their children could have fun there, just like they did.

Who would have thought that Misha wouldn't make it to her 26th birthday? Now it was up to him to raise their son and close the gap that gaped between them.

He felt something fall against his elbow and looked sideways. His son fell asleep and was lying on him. He looked very young and vulnerable in his sorrow. Syaoran felt much love for his little son, though he didn't always show it. Very carefully, with one hand behind the wheel, he pushed the boy in a more comfortable position. When he looked up, he saw a sign in light that the car's headlights. There were three named engraved on the sign:

Li  
Hiiragizawa  
Kinomoto

Syaoran felt a sharp pain cutting through his heart when he saw the last name. Memories of Sakura flooded him, when he turned the jeep towards his cottage.

Oh god... years have passed since he last saw her and still... he could remember how she looked like, as if she was right in front of him. He combed through his hair with a shaking hand, when he thought of her. He always had a weak spot for her, but the last summer when she turned seventeen...

She had been at Cherry's Lake for a week with Mei Lin, his cousin, when he and Misha arrived. That was the first time in years he'd seen her. He remembered how his breath got caught in his throat when he looked at her. She already had a nice tan. But what really caught his attention was her auburn hair. As a child she made sure her hair was very short. But now she had let it grow and it looked as soft as silk, falling over her shoulders and cascading down her back and firm, round bosom. In short she looked astonishing.

Syaoran cursed under his breath. He didn't want to think about Sakura. All he wanted was to have a nice relaxing vacation with his son to get things back on track.

When he arrived at his cottage he stopped the jeep and got out. Going to the other side he opened the door and lifted Hao up in his arms.

"Wassa matter?" Hao asked sleepily.

"Shh." Syaoran soothed his child. "It's all alright. We're here, my boy. We're here."

**TBC**

Well tell me what do you think? Review plz! And I don't know when I can update it so plz be patient. Thnx!


	2. chapter 2

A/N 2007: Again some minor adjustments ) Got rid of the annoying author notes in the story. They're so distracting XD and changed Germany to China (which makes way more sense)

" "speaking

' ' thoughts

**Chapter 2**

Sakura was glad she came after all. What a great feeling it was to walk on a deserted beach with bare feet. It was still early, but you could see that this day was going to be one of those beautiful and nice Saturdays. The sky was blue and there wasn't a cloud in sight.

She felt good. She felt nice and relaxed. She felt a lot better than she could have imagined. She also knew why. It was because of Syaoran, because he wasn't here.

Last night on her way here, with Mei Lin she told herself a hundred times that he was in China. But she still wasn't completely at ease. When she saw that the shutters of his cottage were sealed tightly, she breathed a sigh of relief.

At night, when they were drinking coffee after diner she said: " What a shame that I haven't been here for so long."

"You didn't want to be confronted with you past," Mei Lin stated, "Everyone is struggling with his or her memories. It's like gardening: You have to get rid of the weeds to give the flowers a chance to bloom. Nasty memories need to be pulled out to give the nice memories a better chance."

Their eyes met. Sakura saw so much love and understanding in the eyes of Mei Lin that she almost cried. Quickly she got up and went to the balustrade to hide her tears. The mug of coffee was warm in her hands. She had to blink her eyes a couple of times to get rid of her tears and stare over the dark and mysterious water.

On the other side she could faintly hear some voices and laughter, mixed with some romantic music. Somewhere there was the smell of wild flowers blooming and there were fireflies flying around everywhere.

"So what do you think?" Mei Lin asked softly, "Do you want to keep the cottage?"

It took a while for Sakura to answer, "I want to think about it a little longer, Mei Lin." Slowly she turned around and faced her friend. "I'll sleep a night over it. I'll give you my answer tomorrow."

Now it was tomorrow.

Wanting to feel the water she began to walk through the water. With her hands in the pockets of her short white pants, she began to enjoy the feeling of water running over her feet.

Now it was tomorrow, yes, and she had made her decision.

Just after midnight she woke up because she thought she heard something. After that she had trouble falling asleep. And lying there, she thought about the offer Mei Lin made. Finally after hours of tossing, turning and thinking, she made her decision.

It was painful coming back here. But it was even more painful if this little cottage fell into the hands of a total stranger.

Mei Lin was right. Nasty memories needed to be pulled out with the root and all. Then they could wither in the sun. Not that she was ready for it. No, not yet. Maybe she would come again this summer, on her own. And then, maybe she could close the chapter of her past, so she could start out fresh again. How lovely it would be if she could finally heal her wounded soul...

What joy, what a victory that would mean.

She stood there, with her back to the land and closed her eyes as she lifted her face up to the sun so that the golden rays of light caressed her beautiful face. She let her hands comb through her hair and said aloud: "Yes," with determination in her voice.

"What yes?"

Sakura wheeled around as she heard a voice. There was a hint of curiosity in the voice, but also something hostile and sullen.

The child that stood on the beach, straddle-legged and defiant, was a boy of 7 years old. He had messy brown hair and amber coloured eyes that looked at her behind a pair of glasses. He pushed his glasses up his nose. A gesture that he was accustomed to. He was slim, his skin was slightly tanned because of the sun and he wore a pair of boxers with a white T- shirt.

"What yes?" he repeated making a weird face.

Sakura walked back to the shore, but the child quickly stepped back, when she came towards him. He looked her over and suddenly his eyes became big and his bottom lip started to quiver.

'Do I look that horrifying?!' Sakura thought by herself, 'Or is the boy warned on an exaggerate manner not to trust strangers?'

"Hi," she greeted with a smile that was meant to calm his nerves. "Where are you from? I thought that I was here all by myself." She glanced up at the hotel named Cherry's Lodge. In the old days the Lodge belonged to a rich American, now it was a fancy hotel that belonged to a Chinese couple. Sakura suspected that the boy came from there.

"Why are you talking to yourself?" the boy asked.

She shrugged. "I needed to make a decision and decided that my answer was yes. Don't you ever talk to yourself?"

"Sometimes." The boy admitted

Sakura felt that her top had slipped down a bit when she stretched her arms and pulled it up.

"I'm going to get myself a cup of coffee," she announced, "But I need to get you back to your mum first before she's going to worry herself to death."

I haven't got a mother anymore."

Sakura heard his voice tremble and regretted what she said. "I'm sorry. What about your father?"

"He's baking pancakes."

The boy had a weird accent. English? French? And why was his father baking pancakes when they were staying at Cherry's Lodge?

"You are staying at Cherry's Lodge, aren't you?" she asked, just to be certain. With her hands on her hips she looked inquisitive at him.

"No," she heard a voice say, "He's with me."

Chinese! That was the accent. But now she knew it was too late...

"Hello Sakura."

Her heart froze. She tried to pull herself together with all her might before she turned around.

"Syaoran." She should have been surprised to see him, but she wasn't. That he was here suddenly seemed as inevitable as a new day. "What are you doing here?"

**TBC**

So... What you think? Review plz! Hope to get the next chap up soon!


	3. chapter 3

A/N 2007: Again, nothing big. Got rid of my annoying A/N at the beginning though ; and a minor name change again (but not crucial to the story).

Here's chapter 3 folks! And some reviewers have been asking what happened that 'faithful summer'. Well I can't tell you! It's all part of the plot in my story!

**Chapter 3**

"Syaoran." She should have been surprised to see him, but she wasn't. That he was here suddenly seemed as inevitable as a new day. "What are you doing here?"

Same as you I guess. Holding a vacation." Syaoran's eyes looked right into hers and Sakura gulped nervously. Just when she wanted to blink, his eyes drifted to her mouth.

"Hao..." he was still staring at her mouth as if his life depended on her lips. "Your pancakes are ready. The syrup is on the table."

Okay." The boy walked away, his shoulders slumped.

With much effort Syaoran was able to tear his gaze away from her lips and look into the direction of his son. "Hao!" His voice sounded edgy. The child hesitated for a while, looked back and mumbled "thank you" then turned around again to walk away, a bit faster than before.

"That's my son, Hao." Syaoran said with a flat voice. Frustrated he lifted his arm and scratched his chest under his loose hanging shirt that he wore.

Sakura's eyes unconsciously roamed over his chest, his flat stomach... Not daring to look further, she gulped again.

She forced her eyes upwards, enjoying the view of the man that she gave her heart to. He seemed taller than she could remember and leaner. His shoulders were broader and his neck was more muscular. He hadn't shaved himself and his hair was as messy as ever. Suddenly Sakura's legs felt like jelly. She wobbled a bit but managed to stand her ground.

"Yes," she made her voice sound casual. "I thought so"

"How are you?" While he was speaking his eyes roamed over her body, just like she did a few seconds ago and she felt very uneasy in her very short pants and pink strapless top.

"I'm fine," she said, pulling her top a bit higher. "How about you? Is everything okay? When Mei Lin and I heard that Misha... It was such a shock."

"Yeah, right."

"We wanted to go to the funeral, but - "

"It was a private funeral, that was Misha's wish. She and my cousin never had a close bond. You were always best friends with her. And concerning you and your niece..." The cynical glare that Syaoran gave her told her enough.

Sakura knew exactly what he was thinking. According to him it was her fault that she and her niece were never that close. If only he knew! But he wouldn't. There were only three people who knew exactly what happened that night on the beach: Misha, Eriol and Sakura herself. Misha was dead, Eriol will keep his mouth shut for sure and she, Sakura, swore that Syaoran would never know the truth. After all, his happiness was more important to her than anything else.

"I didn't tell Hao who you are because I wanted to talk to him about it first." His voice sounded detached. "I had no idea that you would be here. When Mei Lin wrote to your aunt I heard from Rika that she wanted to sell the cottage. So I expected that it would be empty or maybe rented by someone. You see, Misha never told Hao about you. I'll have to explain that we're family first."

"He... er... doesn't seem very happy."

"Hao is going through some difficult times. That's why we're here." Syaoran's mouth contorted, "I was always happy here, so I thought that maybe he could also be happy here in this little piece of paradise."

Sakura met his gaze. "It was a paradise once." She said softly.

In every paradise there's a snake."

It was like he was stabbing a knife through her heart. When she was seventeen and head over heels in love, she cherished a bitter grudge against Syaoran. He judged and condemned her for something, without having any direct evidence that lead to her. He knew her long enough to know that she would never do what he suspected that she had done.

'Men can be so blind sometimes.' She thought indignantly.

Her niece Misha got Syaoran good, with her act of innocence, her sweet smile and her voice as sweet as sugar. He was blinded by her beauty, without knowing what kind of woman she was behind her mask.

Sakura refused to dwell further down her train of thoughts. If you can't say anything nice about the dead, then say nothing at all. And besides, she realized now that she could never blame Syaoran that he drew the wrong conclusion. What should he have thought? A smile graced her lips, as she thought back to a happier memory.

"What's so funny?" he snapped seeing Sakura smile.

Sakura looked up, surprised. "Excuse me?"

"Do you think it's funny that - "

"Oh, about the snake." Sakura played with a lock of her auburn hair. "No," she said casually, "I was thinking of something else."

"Something or someone else?" sounded Syaoran's taunting voice.

"That's for me a know and for you to find out." Came the teasing answer of Sakura.

Suddenly Syaoran's hand shot out, grabbing Sakura's left hand. "No ring." He stated "Not up for commitment?"

Sakura jerked her hand out of his. "Things like that are possible without expensive diamonds, you know" she added snapping.

"No ring, no rights" Syaoran said. " So the battle isn't over yet. I'm curious who will come out as the victor."

Sakura was put out of countenance; this was a side of Syaoran she never knew. She searched for a witty answer when she heard Mei Lin calling.

Sakura! Coffee's ready! And Tomoyo called. She said that they couldn't make it this weekend because of an important meeting. Oh my... Syaoran! What a surprise! Won't you come and have a cup of coffee with us?"

"Hey, Mei Lin." He called back. "Not now, but I owe you one okay?"

The smile changed him. He was the Syaoran of the past again- handsome and kind. Sakura felt her insides melt and it wasn't because of the sun.

When Mei Lin disappeared into the house again, his smile disappeared also. So you're here with my cousin."

"That's right. So no man." Sakura made a face. "Too bad huh?"

"Oh..." He shrugged. "It's always more exciting when there is a bit of competition, right? Wasn't that the reason you went after Eriol Hiiragizawa? Because he belonged to someone else?"

"That's why I didn't felt like coming this weekend," Sakura's voice sounded bored, "I didn't want the risk to run into you."

He ignored her teasing comment. "So you'll be leaving tomorrow?"

"Yes, I will." She confirmed. "I just came as a favour to Mei Lin."

"Is she really planning on selling the cottage?"

"That's up to me to decide."

Syaoran raised his eyebrows questioningly.

"Mei Lin doesn't like to go here all by herself. At least that's what she told me and Tomoyo. But I think there's more to it."

"What do you mean?"

Sakura shrugged. "I mean what I said. And don't ask me how I know. I just have these feelings. Call it woman's intuition." She heard Syaoran snort at that. "Anyway I'm allowed to keep the house if I want to, because she doesn't want it anymore. And if I don't want to keep it- "

"Then it will be sold." Syaoran looked at Sakura. "So what are you planning to do?"

'I'd already decided, but now that you're here I'm not so sure anymore.' Flashed through Sakura's mind. "I'm not sure," she said aloud, "I promised Mei Lin that I would tell her today. So I'll just be on my way then to tell Mei Lin my decision." And Sakura started to walk away.

"Wait a moment!" He grabbed her by her arm.

"What?" He was standing so close that she could smell the faint scent of his skin. So close that she only needed to extent her hand to touch his cheek. Oh, how she longed to touch it!

"After breakfast me and Hao will be dropping by to meet his aunt. And you since you're here too." She heard the loathing in his voice as he said the last part and felt her heart twitch painfully.

"That's seems to be a excellent idea." Sakura bit out. "He looked quite frightened when he saw me. Probably because I remind him of his mother."

They looked each other straight into the eyes and Sakura regretted the words she said when she saw the pain in his eyes. She'd never seen it before. She pushed her hands into her pockets to prevent herself of hugging him close. If things just were like they were before... That time had past though.

"I'm sorry Syaoran," she whispered, "You must miss Misha." Tears were stinging in her eyes and she quickly turned around so he wouldn't see them. "Sorry, but I've got to go." She managed to choke out before she walked away.

This time he didn't stop her.

**TBC**  
Does anyone have any ideas? I mean what happened at the beach last summer? I gave a few hints/suggestions away in the 1st and this chapter. If you want to find out... KEEP READING! And trust me I know what I'm doing. R&R plz! I need to know what you think!


	4. chapter 4

A/N 2007: I keep saying this, but again minor adjustments. Again a small name change. Nothing crucial.

Hey guys! I'm back with chapter 4! Well not much to say this time. Except for the usual disclaimer and stuff. Hope you enjoy this chapter.

**Chapter 4**

"So Syaoran is here."

"Indeed he is." With much effort Sakura was able to keep her emotions in check as Mei Lin gave her a searching look.

"Alone?"

"With Hao."

"Hmmm... He must miss his mother terribly."

"I guess so." Sakura began to fumble with her napkin. "According to his father he's going through some difficult times. He's hoping that this summer at the lake will mend his sorrow."

"And Syaoran? What do you think about him?"

"Hard to say."

Mei Lin looked at her friend questioningly.

"He is..." Sakura tried to find the right words to describe Syaoran's attitude.

"Mourning over his loss?" Mei Lin said helpfully.

"After the death of his father he was also mourning." Sakura folded her napkin. "But even then he was nice." Nice? He was THE nicest person to ever walk the earth those 3 days before Eriol and Misha messed everything up.

"He was kind enough to me."

"Yeah that guy can be very kind if-"

"Syaoran."

"What?" Sakura looked up, surprised.

"Syaoran." Mei Lin poured her another cup of coffee. "His name is Syaoran. You can pronounce his name, can't you?"

"But I don't want to!" Sakura blushed at her answer. It sounded so childish. 'What's wrong with me? I'm 25 years old, not a 17-year-old teenager whose feelings are hurt.' She stood up. "Mei Lin, about the cottage… I thought I knew what I wanted this morning, but now that he's here, I'm not so sure anymore. I need more time."

"For what?"

"To figure out what his plans are. If he's going to come here every summer... Well the situation would be unbearable. With he avoiding me. I can't relax that way." Her voice faltered. Quickly she went to the window to look out on the lake.

"You like to come here just as much as I do." Mei Lin said. "Listen here Sakura. Don't make any hasty decisions. I can stay the whole summer while I'm here."

"Mei Lin!" Sakura said alarmed and turned around to face her friend. "I told you I can't possibly-"

"Sakura, Sakura," Mei Lin soothed, "You don't hear me saying that you should stay with me the whole summer, do you? Just come here whenever you've got time. You told me that Syaoran would stay the whole summer with his child. Well then this is the perfect opportunity to get to know my little cousin!"

Her eyes sparkled the way they used to sparkle, before she broke up with Hiroshi and Sakura felt a pang of guilt. It was her who matched them together. She never knew that he had someone else back in America. She recalled what Mei Lin said that happened the day that he left.

FLASHBACK

"I'm sorry. I have to go back to America."

"It's okay..." Mei Lin's eyes were brimming with unshed tears as she stared at the floor. "I'll wait here for you."

"Mei Lin, I... I might not be coming back." Mei Lin's head shot up looking him straight into the eyes. It's best... if you don't wait for me."

"Why?" the tears were rolling of her cheeks now.

"Because... there's someone waiting for me in America. She can't live without me."

"I... I... I u-under-s-stand." Mei Lin managed to choke out and she looked at the floor again.

Hiroshi lifted her head up and wiped away her tears. Slowly he pressed his lips against hers, for a soft last kiss.

"Last call. Passengers of flight 885 going to America boarding right now. This is the last call."

He broke the kiss and turned away to get on board of the plane. Looking back, just to see her one last time he noticed that she had disappeared.

END FLASHBACK

She had comforted Mei Lin as much as she could, but her work had always come first. It started back then to block out her painful memories- the work made her forget about it for a while- of Syaoran and her. Now she realized that she could have told Mei Lin about her secret. After all she kind of experienced the same thing. Maybe she would have understood.

She walked towards Mei Lin and hugged her tightly.

"You're right. I can't just decide it right now. And I can't just let my decision depend on my neighbour. I can't promise to be here every weekend, but I'll come here as often as I can." She broke away from the hug and managed to look cheerful."Well, what about it?"

"I think it's an excellent idea."

There was a loud knocking on the door. Sakura turned her head to the door and saw Syaoran standing in the open doorway. 'Damn!' she thought. 'How much did he hear from our conversation?'

While Sakura tried to remember what she said exactly, Mei Lin went to Syaoran.

"Hi, Syaoran!" Her voice sounded happy and she gave him a hug.

"Mei Lin! You look great!" He pulled himself out of the embrace and looked in her ruby-red eyes. "It's great to see you again. Hao..." He pulled the boy out, who tried to hind behind his back. "This is Mei Lin, your aunt."

Mei Lin looked at the boy. After a while she nodded her head and said: "Yes, he's a real Li. Good." She saw Hao edging towards his father again and laughed. "Don't worry, I don't bite. And I won't hug you either unless you want to. You know girls like to be hugged. Anyway how would you like to call me?"

"You're my Aunt Mei Lin." The boy said as a matter of fact.

"Then Aunt Mei Lin it is." She smiled. "You already met my friend. Sakura Kinomoto is-"

"Daddy already told me that she's my mommy's cousin." Sakura could hear by the way that Hao was talking she would probably be called 'Miss Kinomoto'. Quickly she said: "That's right. My grandmother had 2 children: Nadeshiko and Kyo. Nadeshiko married and had a baby: me. Kyo married and had a baby: your mother. And because I don't have any cousins and I'll never get them either I would like it if you called me aunt Sakura."

She knew it would be rude if he refused. One look on his face told her that he knew what she was doing. A smile tugged at corner of his lips.

Mei Lin walked towards the table and poured a new cup of coffee while chattering away.  
Sakura waited for a reply of the boy.

"When I first saw you on the beach I thought you looked like mommy." Hao's eyes glittered with mirth. "But now I see that I'm wrong." Softly so that she could only hear it he said: "You're prettier than my mom," he blushed, because he said that she was prettier than his own mother was, "but my daddy loved her very, very much."

"Thank you for the compliment. And yes, I know your father loved her dearly." Sakura felt the need to wrap her arms around him so she could comfort him. It was clear that the boy was suffering from his loss. 'Does Syaoran realize how hurt the boy was?' she hoped so. For his and the boy's sake. "Hao," she played with a lock of her auburn hair, "I think that there's an old photo-album with some pictures of your mother in it, lying around here somewhere. Would you like to look in it?"

"Now?" His glasses slipped a bit and he pushed them back up.

"Why not?"

"Sakura." Mei Lin touched Sakura's arm. "Shall we drink some coffee outside? The weather's too nice to be sitting in this cottage. Here." She gave Hao a glass of lemonade. "Try it. It's my own recipe." She nudged the boy softly out on the patio.

Syaoran waited for Sakura but she shook her head.

"You can go already." She said in a flat voice. "I promised Hao to show him some old pictures of Misha." After a short hesitation she decided: "It'll do him good to be with Mei Lin. She's good in getting along with the children. She thought that she could see Syaoran's eyes soften a bit, but it was gone before she could confirm her thoughts.

Syaoran folded his arms and leaned against the wall. "You know what I want to know?" He suddenly asked.

"What?" Sakura asked, not really wanting to know.

"How can you be so sure that you'll never have any cousins?"

"Oh you mean that." Sakura looked at a cabinet filled with porcelain cups and old photos. "Well I don't have any sisters or brothers-"

"You know what I mean." She could hear by the way he was talking that he wanted her to look him straight in the eye. She refused to do it. "If you marry you can have lots of cousins or children for that matter."

Children. Once, she wanted children from Syaoran. That dream was over though.

"I don't plan on marrying." She said forcing herself to meet his gaze. "Now if you'll excuse me, I've got to get Hao that album." She turned away and left the kitchen. He didn't follow her.

What would he say if he knew it was because of him that she never wanted to marry? Because she never met anyone who could stand in his shadow, let alone replace him. She tried, really she did, but all that was left were 2 failed relationships. She blinked a tear away. How would he feel if he knew she loved him, just as much as he loved Misha?

It was ironic that Misha never wanted to meet him if Sakura didn't take so many pictures of him. Would it have ended differently if they had never met? Would she be married to Syaoran instead of Misha?

She squatted near the cupboard and got a pile of photo-albums out. She only wanted to get the red one, but she pulled another one out. A green album.

Her eyes became moist when she looked at a picture of Syaoran. The album didn't just fell open on this page. She used to spend hours looking at this picture of him. A smile tugged at her lips as she thought back to the day when she shot this picture.

FLASHBACK

Granny Momoko had baked 3 pies. 2 of them stood by the window, cooling down. Sakura grabbed the 3rd to bring it to Tomoyo and her parents. On her way back she saw Syaoran creeping to the window. 'Ha, got you this time!' Sakura thought as she sneaked into the cottage and grabbed her camera. She was just in time to see Syaoran take the pie into his hands. 1 second before she pressed the button, he noticed something. He looked up and laughed!

END FLASHBACK

When the photos were done and Sakura saw that picture she melted inside. Syaoran's eyes in the picture glittered mischievously, his hair was tousled by the wind and he smiled, as if he liked being caught red-handed. It could have melted the coldest hearts. Her heart wasn't made out of ice, no. It was burning with passion and it was kind of scary for a 14-year-old girl.

She took the photo-album that time when she went to China to stay there for a couple of weeks. Misha was there too. She never went anywhere in the summer because she was too comfortable in her own house. One day Misha came in when she was staring at this very picture.

FLASHBACK

"What's that?" her 16-year-od cousin asked. "Oh, don't tell me you're one of those crazed fans that writes letters to their idols?"

Sakura didn't reply. She didn't want to share her secret with anyone. Her silence only made her cousin curious.

Unexpectedly, she snatched the album away and saw what was written on the page under the photo: "To my little Summer-Sprite. Love, Syaoran."

It was quiet for a moment as Misha processed the information. Then it came: "Syaoran Li." Misha's voice sounded cold. "I heard Grandmother talk about him. Doesn't he own two out of the three Cherry Lake cottages?"

Sakura only nodded.

"Is he rich?"

Sakura shrugged this time. "I guess so. Yeah, Syaoran's parents own the Li Companies. They're really nice though."

END FLASHBACK

The next summer Misha came to Cherry Lake for two months. Granny, Tomoyo, Mei Lin and Sakura were really surprised. Misha never wanted anything to do with the 'primitive stuff' as she called it. Only when Sakura noticed that her beautiful cousin had her eye on Syaoran, she knew what was going on. Still she didn't tell Mei Lin, Tomoyo or anyone else, that Misha saw Syaoran's picture and wanted to know if he had money or not.

"Did you find it?"

Sakura startled when she heard Hao's voice right behind her. With a bang she closed the green album, put it back and gave Hao the red one.

"Here you go." She wiped off the dust that had collected itself on the book over the years. "You can keep it, if you want."

Hao took the album and pressed it against his chest. His mouth opened and closed a few times, like he wanted to say something, but nothing came out.

His gaze drifted from her face to her hair. He lifted his hand.

'To push up his glasses.' Sakura thought

But, to her surprise, he gently touched her hair, as if he wanted to know how it felt.

Sakura couldn't move. She was touched by his emotions.

'Does Hao remember how his mother's hair felt like?' Misha also had auburn hair, but not as thick as Sakura's. "Hao." she whispered hoarsely and wanted to touch his hand. He pulled his hand back quickly, before she could touch it and ran away, with the album still pressed against his chest.

She thought she heard a muffled sob, but when she came out, on the patio, later he was quietly sipping his lemonade. She looked at him and he looked back coolly, as if nothing happened.

**TBC**  
Well that's it for chapter 4 guys! Review! Otherwise I won't be continuing! Nah, just kidding. I couldn't do that to the faithful readers of the story (if there are any!). Well stay tuned for upcoming chapters, cos very soon I'll spill the secret of what happened that 'faithful night'! And also: thnx for all the people that reviewed this story!


	5. chapter 5

A/N 2007: It's weird, the two jobs I threw together for Sakura. I made some minor adjustments in this chapter for it. And I did a name change again ; but yet again, it's nothing crucial.

Hey guys! Sorry I didn't update this story for a while but I have a good reason for that and no it's not school! Well, it has a little to do with school. It was actually my mum. My mum officially banished me from the computer at my home for 2 whole months! (So technically I'm still not allowed on the computer, but if no one notices...) She said it was because I wasn't doing well at school (I am! Just not as well as my sister, but she is inhuman! I mean who gets an A+ on their report card for Math AND Latin?!) and spending too much time behind the computer. Anyway, my story was stored away on the computer and since I couldn't reach it. Well you know where I'm going to right?

" " talking

' ' thinking

**Chapter 5**

"It's going excellent with Sakura," Mei Lin said when Sakura joined them outside on the veranda. "She's even on the front cover of Vogue! I don't know why she even keeps her job as a teacher."

"Mei Lin you know I like to be around people! Besides I wouldn't be in the Vogue if it weren't for Tomoyo's success with her clothing line." Sakura said.

"Vogue," Syaoran said, "Wow, that's not bad. So your dream changed over the years?"

"It didn't," Sakura corrected him calmly; her gaze fell on her cup of coffee. " I only model for Tomoyo. And it was my goal to become successful so Tomoyo's clothing would gain fame." And she silently added: 'Dreams only come true by a miracle. To achieve a goal it takes devotion, ambition, talent and a lot of hard work.'

How many times did she and Syaoran sit here? With a fiery enthusiasm they talked about their future. She wanted to become a teacher and he wanted to be the next leader of the Li-clan. But she never talked about her dream with him. Syaoran was the last person to whom she could tell her dreamto. He WAS her dream. He too never talked about his dreams. At least, not until he fell in love with Misha. Afterwards he could only talk about Misha this and Misha that.

"Alright your goal." Syaoran leaned back lazily. "If I remember correctly you achieved your goal sooner than you thought."

"What does he mean Sakura?" Mei Lin asked curiously.

"Well ever since I was a little girl I already knew that I would become a model. Even then I was walking around in the clothes that Tomoyo designed for me, remember? He's right though... I never thought that I would achieve my goal so quickly."

"That's not so surprising." Mei Lin noticed a bit disapprovingly. "If you fell in love on a nice young man of your age and lived a little, then you wouldn't have spend every single hour you had on that modelling career of yours."

"I did have boyfriends. You know that very well. Take Jefrrey Walkings and Kazuya Kyushu for example. You liked them too, or so you said. How come you've forgotten them already?"

"Oh that's such a long time ago. Now it's like you have a new boyfriend every weekend." Sakura gave Mei Lin the evil eye, but Mei Lin remained calm and stared back, defiantly. Sakura stood up.

"I think I'm going to take a stroll over the beach." She announced.

Syaoran and Mei Lin stood up as well. Mei Lin turned towards Hao.

"Hao, I need to plant some few vegetables in the garden. I could use some help, especially with the watering pot. That thing is so heavy. Well what do you say? You'll have to pull of your shoes, because it's probably going to be messy."

"I'm not allowed to get dirty. Mommy doesn't like..." He shut up immediately and he could feel the heat rushing towards his cheeks.

Mei Lin was staring at the boy, shocked, Syaoran stared at his son as if he was an alien. Sakura realized that somebody had to help him out.

"Hao?"

He looked up at her and she smiled reassuringly. "Sweetie, nobody cares if you get a little dirty. That's the fun part of it all. I can understand that your mommy didn't want to get your school uniform dirty or any of your good clothes, but-"

"I wasn't allowed to get dirty. Ever." Stubborn he stared at her. "I don't want to get dirty. You can't make me!"

'What the hell was wrong with Misha?' Sakura thought. 'Telling her son not to get dirty. Outrageous!'

"Then you'll come and watch me doing it." Mei Lin decided. "I don't mind to get a bit dirty. You know what? When I'm finished you can clean my dirty legs and feet by using the hose, alright?"

Hao's glasses slipped a bit and he pushed them back up his nose. Sakura thought she saw a faint smile tugging at the corners of his lips.

"Okay," he mumbled, "I would like to do that."

"Good." Mei Lin opened the door for him and together they disappeared into the house, leaving an uncomfortable Sakura and a cold Syaoran alone.

"Well," she said stiffly, taking a step back, "I'll be on my way then."

"Wait a minute." Syaoran said and in one quick move he was standing right next to her on the stairs. He grabbed her arm. "Where are you going?"

His touch made her skin all tingly in a pleasant way. Resentful she shook his arm off.

"Are you deaf?" She looked up at him and immediately wished that she didn't. His amber eyes were blinding and his arrogant gaze frightful. "I'm going to take a little stroll." She said.

"I'm coming with you."

"I don't want you to come with me. I'd rather go alone. I want to be able to think clearly."

"About what you want to do with the cottage?"

"Yes. About the cottage."

"Well," Syaoran said in a coolly. "We can stay here, while you're being stubborn telling me not to come along with you, when you perfectly know that you can't stop me anyway. Or we can walk awhile. I'm staying here the whole summer and according to Mei Lin you are going to come here as often as you can. You seem to be single and so am I. We know each other since we were like what? Seven years old so lets make it a summer to remember okay?" He laughed harshly. "Just a summer fling. Well, what do you think?"

Sakura stood there, perplexed. No that wasn't the right word. She was insulted! Though... it was understandable. From his point of view on the whole Eriol and Misha matter. And Mei Lin also said that she had loads of boyfriends. She couldn't know that they were only friends and not more than that.

"You mean an affaire?" Sakura raised one of her eyebrows mockingly. "Is that wise with all the sexual relationships that I've had?"

"Oh, that's not a problem." A soft breeze coming from the direction of the water blew in her face. With an irritated gesture he pushed his unruly hair back, out of his eyes.

"You've changed." She shivered, as she looked at him "You're not the same guy from the past."

"You're talking about the past. The past isn't the present."

He blocked her way when she wanted to walk further. He was standing a step lower, so their eyes were on the same height. She was staring straight into his amber gazers.

"I never understood," he said roughly, "why a beautiful woman like you had to go and do it with a married man. You could've had any man you wanted with your looks. Why did you have to have Eriol Hiiragizawa? I've known him since I was a little child and I could've sworn that he was the last person on earth to cheat on his wife."

"Well, that shows how good you know Eriol. Or me for that matter."

The memory of that summer, long ago, made Sakura's voice sound bitter. She tensed up, when Syaoran suddenly grabbed her and pulled her towards him. Before she could do anything he kissed her hard and intense.

It didn't even last 15 seconds.

Syaoran was panting heavily and her lips were tingling. Never before had he treated her like this. It was like he'd given her a blow in the face.

"Don't do that again..." she whispered hoarsely and looked at her face, his dark hair, tanned skin and amber eyes.

His mouth was drawn in a cynical smirk.

He kissed her. There was a time when she would have sold her soul for a kiss from him, Syaoran Li. She never thought that she would react like this. A sob welled up in her throat.

"This is gonna be one hell of a summer, Sakura. I bet that I'll have you in my bed by the end of it. Then I'll find out how you seduced a man like Eriol while his wife was lying in the hospital." He snorted. "It's a challenge, shall we say?" After that he turned around and walked away. A few seconds later she heard a door being opened and closed.

Confused, Sakura went to the beach. What had possessed her to come to the cottage? Could she be even more stupid?

Then the image of Hao appeared in her mind. She pitied the child. Maybe this summer would end nicely. Maybe Mei Lin could help Hao open up and teach him how to handle his sorrow.

If it weren't for Hao she would've gone home immediately. She had to keep herself away from Syaoran and most of all away from his bed.

* * *

Tomoyo and her child arrived that day at Cherry's Lake.

Sakura hadn't noticed it. She was busy with cleaning out the shed.

'Just in case Mei Lin wants to sell the cottage.' She told herself. Deep in her heart she knew that the real reason that she was doing this was to avoid Syaoran.

It was half past 4 when she stopped cleaning. She was resting against a tree when she heard someone walking towards her.

'Probably Mei Lin.' She thought and opened her eyes to see... Tomoyo.

"Tomoyo?" Sakura said smiling

Tomoyo beamed. "Sakura! How is my favourite model doing?" And they both hugged each other.

"Pretty good. How about you?" Sakura asked breaking the hug.

"It' couldn't be better! But I've got to go now. My children are unpacking and I need to get the rest of the stuff out of the car. But I'll see you tonight at the barbeque, right? I've got enough steaks to feed an orphanage."

Sakura knew that Tomoyo and Eriol were still married. Happily married. Though Tomoyo came alone with the kids. Maybe Eriol was busy and couldn't come. Sakura hoped so. The situation was hard enough without Eriol. Even if Eriol was here, she wouldn't have had a good excuse to decline the invitation. Tomoyo knew nothing about the incident and Sakura would never tell her.

"Yeah, sounds like fun." She said

"Good! I'll see you at seven then." And Tomoyo walked off with Sakura looking sadly at her retreating back.

She went back to the shed, but she had lost her drive to clean it further. Tomoyo's appearance here raked up the painful memories... Memories she tried to forget... Memories of that night... The night of treason.

"Sakura! I've made tea! Want some?"

Sakura heard Mei Lin's voice and decided not to clean anymore. She got up and went back into the cottage.

"Did Tomoyo tell you about the barbeque? It's gonna be fun. She invited Syaoran too. It's gonna be just like old times."

"Yeah," Sakura agreed. She felt her heart pound heavily. "Except that Eriol won't be there."

"Oh didn't Tomoyo tell you? Eriol is going to arrive here at 8 o'clock."

**TBC**  
So what do you think? Ducks from all the S+S lovers Please don't flame me! Well flame me if you must, but I promise it's all going to turn out well! After all it IS a S+S fic! Grins Well till next time! And since it's x-mas break I think I can post the next chapters up sooner, IF my parents aren't hanging around the computer. JA NE! And don't forget to review!!


	6. chapter 6

A/N 2007: Heh, I keep changing names, and got out some spelling errors. Other than that, nothing much.

A/N: Well sorry for the late update, I know you have been waiting long. (3 whole weeks!) But here's chapter 6! Hope you all have reading fun. And If you discover anything wrong plz mail me so I can correct it.  
And this chapter contains a little bit, just a tiny little bit, really not much, adult ehm.. how do you say that? Content? Probably something like that.

**Chapter 6**

The cottage of the Hiiragizawa's had a veranda, decorated by plants in pots, like peonies, lobelia's and fuchsia's. Usually Sakura would've enjoyed the beauty of it all, but not tonight. Because Syaoran was here and she was afraid that she would give herself away with one word or gesture. Beside the love she felt for him, there was also her grudge against him, against the way he treated her. It was so difficult to stay in control of her emotions that she could feel a headache coming up. This was the moment she feared most; she and Syaoran were alone.

The barbeque was over. Tomoyo was inside to make some coffee, Mei Lin and the kids were taking a walk. Eriol said he would arrive later. There was a tense silence hanging between them now that everyone was gone. Syaoran was the first one to speak.

"So," his tone was clipped, "Are you still seeing Eriol?" He looked Sakura right in the eyes.

"Eriol?" she reacted coolly, "I haven't seen him in 8 years. Not since the last time I was here."

Syaoran arched one of his eyebrows. "So it was just a one-night stand?"

Sakura glanced at the kitchen-window making sure that Tomoyo didn't hear their conversation. Then she hissed: "What the hell do you think you're doing?"

"Don't worry," his eyes shone with loathing, "Tomoyo can't hear us. Why would you care anyway? When I think about the times she stood up for you! You could always talk to her and laugh with her, but in the meantime... how low to stab her in the back like that. She didn't deserve it."

"Then why seek my company? You could've gone with Mei Lin and the kids. Then I would be here alone-"

"Waiting for Eriol. Yeah, I wouldn't want to miss that."

"I'm not waiting for Eriol!" she shook her head in denial.

"You're a woman full of passion, Sakura. On a nice summer eve like this with romantic music playing," he was referring to the song that was playing, "how about you and me, alone in a room..."

Sakura stood up. "I don't need to hear this! My apology to Tomoyo, but-"

"Shall I say that you have a headache?" he mocked.

"Whatever." She wanted to walk away, when somebody came onto the veranda.

"Eriol?" she said surprised, "I didn't hear a car."

He was just as surprised as she was. A light blush tinted his handsome face. Somewhat confused she saw Eriol walking to her with a strained laugh. The next instant Syaoran was standing next to her. Before she could stop him, he wrapped his arm around her shoulder.

"Eriol, long time no see, old boy. Sakura and I were just talking about old times." He held out his hand.

Sakura saw Eriol hesitating. No wonder. Their last meeting ended up in Syaoran giving Eriol a black eye and a bleeding lip. Eriol took a deep breath and shook Syaoran's hand.

"Nice to see you again, Syaoran. I didn't expect you here. And you neither Sakura." His voice sounded softer, when he spoke to her.

'Probably because of his guilty conscience.' Sakura thought.

Eriol cleared his throat. "Is er... Misha here too?"

Syaoran's arm was still wrapped around Sakura's shoulder. She felt his reaction at the question, but his voice was emotionless when he spoke: "Misha died 6 months ago. I'm here with Hao, our son."

"Oh good gracious! I didn't know." Eriol stuttered, "How terrible!"

Sakura tried to save the situation by saying: "Mei Lin's here too, Eriol. She's gone for a walk with the kids. The barbeque was delicious. How was the ride? It must've been busy on the road, so-"

"Sweetie," Syaoran interrupted her, "didn't you have something to do when Eriol arrived? I'm sure he doesn't want to hold you up."

That was it! Sakura tried to pull herself away from him, but Syaoran wouldn't let her go so easily.

"I haven't seen Eriol for 8 years!" she said with pent-up fury, "We have a lot-"

"I think," Syaoran's voice sounded in her ear, too soft for Eriol to hear, "that Eriol wants to go inside and greet his wife." He looked at her, daring her to ignore him with his eyes. "You don't want to be the fifth wheel, do you?"

It took her a lot of effort, but Sakura remained calm. She let Syaoran take her away from the Hiiragizawa's cottage. Once they arrived on the beach she wanted to ram her elbow in his stomach, when he suddenly let go of her.

"So that's settled." Syaoran said, "Eriol is probably thinking that we're going out. I don't think he's going to risk getting the shit beat out of him again. Maybe this summer is going to be fun after all, don't you think, honey?"

"I'm not your honey!" Sakura snarled, "You better count on it that I'm going to help Eriol out of the dream, concerning you and me."

"Don't even think about touching Eriol Hiiragizawa, Sakura. Otherwise, I guarantee you'll regret it."

"Is that a warning? Or maybe a threat?"

"Consider it a threat."

"You won't get to me," Sakura said calmly, "take it from me." She could've said that he couldn't break what was already broken- her heart. She stuffed her hands in her pockets, turned away form him and stared at the dark water. Suddenly she wheeled around and looked at Syaoran. "You know, I'm getting tired of this lecture of yours. For the last time, I'm not interested in Eriol Hiiragizawa! So if you want to have a fun vacation, shut up about it okay?"

He just stared at her, but when he heard voices he turned away. Sakura saw Mei Lin and the children coming their way.

"Come on. Let's meet them half way."

She understood that this was his way to offer peace and decided to accept it for now.

"Alright." She agreed. And to her surprise her headache began to fade away.

Syaoran walked a bit slower so she could keep up with him. There was sand in her sandals. Because it wasn't comfortable she stopped to get it out. Syaoran stopped as well. As she was standing on one leg she lost her balance and grabbed Syaoran's arm to regain it once more. She felt a shock go through her arm as she grabbed him. Quickly retreating her arm, as if bitten by a snake, she mumbled an apology. She looked up at Syaoran to see him staring strangely at her. What was wrong with him?

"Is something the matter?" she asked. And to her surprise she saw the corners of his lips twitch into a small smile.

"You and me, we did have some great times together, didn't we? You could be so annoying... But still a vacation without you wouldn't be the same. How many summers were we together here anyway?"

Seven summers... even if you woke her up in the middle of the night, she would know the answer. Those summers were the happiest summers of her life. But she deliberately said: "Five? Or maybe six? Let me think. Granny took me her after the death of mommy and daddy, so the first summer I must've been seven."

"And I was ten. Do you remember that we sat in the sailboat in the middle of the lake and saw the sun rising? That was my birthday gift to you. You became ten that summer, if I'm correct. You were so afraid that we wouldn't be back before your granny woke up and would find out that you crept out." His eyes twinkled merrily.

Why? Why did he have to dig up the memories of the past? When everything was still sparkling beautiful. Who could've thought that happiness was so frail...

Her sandals dangled loosely in her hand. "Since then I've seen the sun rise a lot of times." She hoped that he wouldn't hear how emotional she was right now. "I went to Hawaii with Tomoyo and Mei Lin 5 years a go. And we saw the sun rise on the top of the Memorial Punchbowl. That moment was unforgettable." If Syaoran wanted to dig up memories, he could do it alone. It was too painful for Sakura.

The walk with Mei Lin gave the kids new energy. Except Hao, he was stumbling behind the other kids, tired out and didn't protest when his father picked him up and said that it was bedtime for him.

"Your father is here." Sakura said to the children of Eriol and Tomoyo. The children cheered loudly and ran to he cottage to greet their father.

"What lovely children they are." Mei Lin said, when she and Sakura walked further. "But Hao... I pity him. I hoped he would get along with Mamoru, but they didn't really like each other. And Miyuki tried to be friends with him, but he acted just like his father."

Sakura looked at Mei Lin, seeing the sadness in her eyes. Sakura knew Mei Lin wanted children and she guessed that seeing the children of Tomoyo and Eriol made her feel lonely. On impulse she hugged Mei Lin and tried to change the subject.

"So how was Cherry's Lodge? It took you so long that I guessed you walked all the way over there. I remember that I always wanted to eat there as a child. It was fascinating to see the waiters and waitresses in their black and white uniforms."

Mei Lin laughed. "It still looks like that. I was thinking, maybe you and me should go for dinner and eat at Cherry's Lodge. Maybe next weekend? How about that? Something to look forward to when you come here again."

Next weekend. Sakura's heart became as heavy as lead. They won't be seeing her next weekend, As soon as she was back in town she would make up an excuse so she wouldn't have to come anymore.

"Saturday seems the best date. " Mei Lin mumbled.

"Mei Lin, are you going to stop at Tomoyo's?"

"Yeah, I'm just gonna say bye to them. Has he heard about Misha?"

"Yes, Syaoran told him."

"It must've been shocking news"

"Yeah, he looked pretty shaken up. Hey Mei Lin, could you tell Tomoyo that I'm tired and I wanted to go to bed early?"

"You're not sick, are you?" Mei Lin asked, concerned.

"I have a headache, but it's fading. I just want to sit for a while." They were standing in front of their cottage.

"Goodnight Mei Lin. I'll see you in the morning."

"Goodnight Sakura."

Relieved Sakura entered the cottage. She didn't lie, she really was tired. The point was... Could she sleep, knowing that Syaoran was sitting 10 meter further at the Hiiragizawa's? Not to mention that Mei Lin was still sad about Hiroshi. She decided that she would write him a letter as soon as possible and try to get them back together again. She walked to her room and lay on her bed, immediately falling asleep as her head hit the pillow.

She woke up with a start. Looking at the clock hanging in her room she saw that it was 4 in the morning. Why did she wake up? Was it Mei Lin stumbling around? Didn't she feel well? Quickly she stood up to check on her. Creeping through the hall she opened the door to Mei Lin's room, only to see her sleeping, snoring softly.

Seeing that she was okay, she closed the door, smiling and walked to the kitchen. Now that she was up, she didn't want to go to bed again.

The lake glittered in the moonlit sky, she saw as she peered out of the window.

Filled with the sudden urge to go outside, she complied to her need. A few seconds later she was walking over the grass towards the beach. And on the beach she steered her feet towards the pier and walked on it, feeling it dancing softly on the rippling water. At the end of the pier she stopped, leaning on the rail. She closed her eyes and smiled softly, when suddenly a hand reached out and touched her shoulder, and she let out a piercing scream.

Her scream echoed over the water and she heard jeering laughter.

"Sorry to startle you, but you startled me, when you appeared here so suddenly." He dried his hair with a towel. It was then that she noticed that he was only wearing a pair of swimming shorts. She felt her skin tingle and automatically stepped a step back when he looked at her revealing night-gown with eyes full of passion.

"What are you doing here anyway?" she asked, her voice higher than usual. His laugh was as the caress of velvet.

"Nothing," he answered, "Nothing...yet." His tone implied that that could change. He leaned back on the rail, folding his arms across his chest. "How about you?"

"I woke up and couldn't sleep anymore, do I decided to go for some fresh air. It was peaceful here... until you showed up."

"It could still be peaceful, or even exciting. Who knows." He gave her a meaningful look.

"Rather not." She replied curtly. "Otherwise I won't be getting any sleep."

"They say that you can get a good night sleep after some good sex. Very relaxing."

"I didn't say I was tense."

"No matter what, sex helps a man." He said smiling. Sakura snorted

"Typical for a man to say something like that. An aspirin and warm, milk is just as good for me."

"Come here."

"Why?"

Suddenly he grabbed her hand and pulled her towards him. Not against his chest, but close enough. Too close... Sakura gulped. It was hard to breathe with him so close to her. She tried to pull her hand away, but he grabbed her other hand too. His eyes glittered as if he was up to something.

"What are you doing?" Sakura's voice sounded hoarse.

Syaoran's laugh made a shiver go up her spine. "Just testing." He mumbled. "So pay attention." He bowed his head and took the strap of her night-gown his teeth. Again she tried to pull away, but he didn't even budge.

"Have patience," came his muffled voice. Ever so slowly he worked the strap off of her shoulder, letting it fall past her elbow. The upper piece of her night-gown slid off and clinged halfway her breast. "Now tell me..." Syaoran let his mouth slide over the soft skin of her breast. Sakura inhaled sharply, feeling new sensations invade her senses. "...if you like this." With his cheek he pushed the cloth further down. His tong circled the now erect nipple and he took it in his mouth, gently sucking on it. A shiver of intense longing drove in Sakura's veins and she moaned softly.

"Well?" his voice sounded far away. "Do you like it?"

A sound of pleasure escaped her lips and Syaoran let her go immediately. Dazed she stared at him.

"I take it the answer is yes." He stated with an arrogant smile adorning his lips. He pulled her night-gown up again. "So what's it going to be Sakura?" He sounded like a doctor, giving a patient his advice. "Sex or an aspirin and warm milk? Your call."

It took a moment for Sakura to come to her senses. Then she became so angry she would've loved to kick him in the crotch. She could scream and beat him up with her bare fists! She could tear her hair out, strangle somebody! HIM for example! With incredible effort she managed to control herself and even bring up an- she hoped an amused- smile.

"Sex is fine Syaoran, but I'll take the aspirin and warm milk. It was an interesting test. I have the impression you've used it before."

"Not with such a result coming out of it. That'll be fun when I have you in my bed."

"Dream on!" she sneered. "Let me through! I want to go back."

"Just a moment."

"Yes?" annoyed she stopped when he barricaded the way.

"Have you decided to sell the cottage?"

Sakura had trouble to not burst out in hysterical laughter. How could he think about something like this after what just happened. Although, this was her chance to find out something more about his plans.

"I was asking myself the same question about your cottage." She said avoiding a direct answer. "Is this only a one time vacation or what?"

"I'm thinking about moving back here. If that works my main office will be relocated and I'll keep the cottage. I'll probably build a few rooms extra to accommodate the house."

"Oh so now the cottage is not good enough for you anymore?"

"Times change Sakura. This cottage is nice and all, but it's only fit for the summer. I want o be able to come here anytime of the year. Then I'll be able to teach Hao ice-fishing, langlaufen, and maybe even skating. Things he never did in his life"

"You and your father used to come here in the winter. Did all those years in China turn you into a wimp?" she scoffed.

"No, I haven't turned into a wimp." He said glaring at her. "But when we're coming here, I need to have space for Hao's nanny."

"Hao has a nanny?"

"Not yet, but I'm busy with it."

"What if you re-marry?" "I will never marry again!" He said vehemently and Sakura looked up at him.

'That isn't surprising,' she thought, 'Misha was everything to him, like he told me so many times, those summers ago.' But he was still young, he couldn't just spend the rest of his life mourning, could he?"

"But what if you fall in love?"

"Love is the last thing I'm looking for." He said curtly. "After I find a suitable nanny I'll arrange something."

"What do you mean?"

"I'll take a mistress," he said, "A nanny and a mistress. What does a guy need more?"

Sakura looked unbelievingly at him. "Are you serious? I've never-"

"I'm just practical, Sakura. I bet there are a lot of women jumping to be my mistress. I've got enough to offer. Just not my heart." He smiled coldly.

""Yeah," she replied coolly, "You've got everything a mistress can wish for."

"You think? Maybe it's something for you then?" He arched an eyebrow mocking her.

"No way, Syaoran!" Roughly she pushed him away and stomped off of the pier. What was that guy thinking? 

**TBC**  
Well that was it for chapter 6, review plz! That's not too much trouble is it? The more reviews, the faster I'll probably update My thanks for the people that reviewed my previous chapters.


	7. chapter 7

A/N 2007: Took out some small errors and changed the names to match the previous changes.

A/N: Yeah I know I'm very VERY late with the update and I know my excuse is lame but school is my priority. Anyway not much to say except that I need to update faster. THANK THE PEOPLE WHO REVIEWED THIS STORY!!!! Without them I wouldn't have gotten so far. But I won't keep you busy with my blabbing anymore so enjoy

**Chapter 7**

Eriol appeared at the door when Mei Lin and Sakura just finished breakfast. Mei Lin offered him a cup of coffee but he declined.

"I just came here to ask you something, Mei Lin.," he said, "Could you do something for me?"

"If I can I would love to help you." Mei Lin answered.

"Oncoming Saturday is Tomoyo's birthday. I want to throw her a surprise- party."

"So how can I help?" Mei Lin asked.

"Well, I'd like to start with bringing some appetizers over on Friday night. Could you keep them in the fridge until Saturday?"

"Of course. There's enough space left. Anything else?"

"Could you keep Tomoyo busy, an hour before the party starts? You can go take a walk or something like that. That'll give me the time to pick up the appetizers and decorate the place. Could you help me with that, Sakura?" Sakura didn't know what to say. Everyone assumed she would be here again next week, while she promised herself she would stay away as long as Syaoran Li was here. The courage to say no disappeared when she saw the glowing face of Mei Lin. She cleared her throat.

"Er... of course, why not? Do the children know?"

"No, I can't take the risk of the children accidentally telling Tomoyo. Even Syaoran doesn't know."

"But what if Syaoran has plans for the weekend?" Mei Lin asked.

"Last night he asked if I could help him. He ordered some wood for the boathouse so that's no problem" Sakura smiled an uneasy smile and pretended to be happy, though she'd rather stay in Tomoeda, watching a good movie...

"Something nice to look forward to." Mei Lin said laughing. "Well I'm going to buy some groceries before it gets too hot to do anything." As soon as the door closed Eriol's smile disappeared. He looked alarmed at Sakura.

"Eriol," she began hastily, "I don't want to talk about-"

"Me neither, but we have to clear up a couple of things. I've been through hell after what happened between me and-" Sakura didn't let him finish.

"How could you cheat on Tomoyo! If she knew about this, it would break her heart!" Sakura yelled at him

"She knows. I told her myself when Mamoru was a few months old. I did break her heart but she forgave me. God knows I didn't deserve it but she gave it to me. Everything that happened that night... it was all my fault. But I'm going to tell Syaoran the truth."

"No! You can't!" Sakura said, panicked at the thought that he would find out the secret she's been keeping.

"Why not?" Eriol asked confused.

"Because... Let's just forget the whole thing okay? We can't change the past. Just drop it."

Eriol frowned and opened his mouth t say something but he thought it over and decided not to. He nodded and something dawned on him.

"He always had a soft spot for you," he said, "and you were in love with him, weren't you? Oh, Sakura..." He took her in his arms trying to comfort her and Sakura let herself be comforted. Of course she loved him, she still does. But Syaoran would always see her as a girl who did it with a married man, a woman who couldn't be trusted.

"Oh, Eriol," she sniffed, "Love is like hell!" From the corner of her eye she spotted some movement at the door and caught a glimpse of a man standing at the door. Through her tears she saw the tall posture of Syaoran, his face livid with anger. What was he doing here? Before she could come up with the answer he closed the door with a bang. Eriol turned around, with Sakura still in his arms.

"Syaoran, what the-"

"Your WIFE send me to get you for breakfast." he sneered, emphasizing the word wife. "You do remember you have a wife don't you?" his eyes sparkled evilly. Tomoyo's voice from outside penetrated the tense silence in the cottage.

"Syaoran, your breakfast is ready! Have you found Eriol yet?"

Syaoran looked at Eriol and said: "Beat it."

Eriol squeezed Sakura's arm reassuringly, pushed Syaoran rather roughly aside with his shoulder and went outside, leaving Syaoran and Sakura alone. Involuntary she stepped a few steps back.

"Too bad that you've been already invited for breakfast," she said sweetly, "otherwise I would've invited you for coffee" and with that she quickly fled to her bedroom, knowing he wouldn't dare to follow her, since Mei Lin could still be in the neighbourhood. In her room she heard Miyuki's voice outside.

"Come quick mister Li. We're eating pancakes today!" Shaking because of her nerves she plopped down on her bed. Why did Syaoran have to show up when she was in Eriol's arms? Not that it mattered anyway, because her already thought that she was a slut...

After breakfast and washing the dishes Sakura ran to the beach and jumped into the water. She swam for about 15 minutes before setting course to the raft drifting a few 100 meters away from the shore. After pulling herself up, she wrung out the water in her hair and lay down on her stomach. The rocking of the raft and the warm rays of the sun shining down on her made her sleepy. Right now Syaoran seemed to be miles away... Suddenly the raft was pushed down on one side, a dark mop of hair came out of the water: Syaoran's hair. Damn it! Couldn't that guy leave her alone? She heard him rummaging around. What was he doing? Tensely she waited wondering what he was going to do. Minutes passed by and when he did nothing she grew impatient. She peered over her arm at him. He was lying on the raft, his arms folded behind his head, sleeping! His dark lashes rested on his cheeks, she heard him snoring softly. She yearned to touch him. To let her hands slide over his o so fine chest, down his stomach to...

"Go ahead."

Sakura held her breath with a smothered sound and looked away hastily from the wet swimming trunks. She looked up at Syaoran and met his knowing gaze. Her heart was thumping so loudly that it seemed it would break her chest.

"I don't mind," his amber eyes twinkled.

"You don't mind what?"

"You touching me. That's what you want isn't it?"

"Why would I want to?" her voice suddenly sounded hoarse.

A smile played around the corners of his mouth. "You tell me." When he smiled she felt her blood boiling like hot water. What was he up to? Why wasn't he raging over her and Eriol?

'I've got to get out of here!' she thought panicking but Syaoran grabbed her hand.

"Let me lead you," he murmured huskily. A hazy look appeared in his eyes. Helplessly she let him put her hand on his chest. The contact with his skin made her hand tingle all over.

"Are you crazy?" she hissed, her cheeks glowing pink, "People can see us from the beach!"

"What's there to see? We're just lying next to each other with your hand on my chest. So?"

"A lot!" she almost yelled. "The hand, for instance, isn't lying there voluntarily!"

"Really?" He pulled her hand down to his stomach. "Weren't you trailing this path with your eyes?"

"The cat can look at the king but that doesn't mean the cat wants to eat the king!" she bit out at him

"You have a point there." Syaoran seemed to amuse himself. "Still, you wanted to touch me. Don't deny it. You're not the first woman to look at me that way. Since I want you in my bed before the summer is over, it's kind of convenient that you're attracted to me. I'm not some guy who gets kicks out of an unwilling woman in my bed. No, give me a warm and willing type, someone like you."

Sakura gasped when he plunged her hand down his stomach. She tried to pull free but his grip was like iron. When she felt herself overwhelmed with a warm feeling that was slowly turning into desire, he let go of her hand. Sakura laid beside him, paralyzed, with her fingers still spread over his wet swimming trunks. When reality struck her she jerked her hand back and stood up. Syaoran looked up at her.

"Good old Eriol knows how things are now." he said with a smug grin. "Didn't you see him going to the boathouse? He's already gone, but he know now to keep his hands to himself." Gasping with rage, Sakura looked down at him, tempted to kick him. It was all a game and she fell for it.

"Don't even think about that." He said closing his eyes. "You know I'm stronger than you."

"I can't believe I ever liked you!" she yelled. "How stupid I was." and she stomped to the side of the raft, diving into the water. The water was cool, but it wasn't enough to cool her rage...or her desire.

While she swam to the surface she realized that she had to get away from Syaoran. She would leave this afternoon instead of tonight, because the situation was getting unbearable. Though she knew she had to come back next week for Tomoyo's surprise-party, but maybe she could manage to keep some distance between them. With a bit of luck that guy would return back to China at the end of the summer-for good. If not there was nothing left for her but to tell Mei Lin that she didn't want to keep the cottage.

"According to Eriol he talked to you this morning."

Sakura was leaning comfortably in a chair, but when Tomoyo spoke she sat straight up.

"Yeah," she said. "I'm glad we sorted things out."

"For me and Eriol, yeah, but for you? When you were 14 you loved Syaoran very much and you were heartbroken when he chose Misha. Don't get me wrong, Syaoran and I are still good friends, but men can be so dense when it comes to women. I know I should've gone to you sooner but Eriol wanted to work this out with you first."

"Please Tomoyo. I don't want to talk about it."

"I understand, but if you ever need help, please don't hesitate and come to us."

"Thanks, Tomoyo, but nobody can help me in this situation anymore. You're friendship meant the world to me when we wee growing up, it still does, but I'm an adult now. I need to learn to stand on my own two feet." Sakura looked at her watch. "I need to go."

""Well, bon voyage, as they say. I'll say hi to Eriol and the kids for you." Tomoyo bit her lip. "Does Syaoran know you're leaving? He's in the boathouse."

"Syaoran and I have nothing to say to each other."

"Oh, Sakura, I know how painful it was for you to be treated like this by Syaoran, but try to understand. We were such good friends and he thinks you've betrayed our trust. You were so sweet and innocent. Think of the shock he had when he thought hat you had sex with a married man. Give him a chance Sakura. Say bye to him. I mean what's there to lose"

"To...lose... Tomoyo..." Sakura's voice broke. "He still thinks that there's something going on between me and Eriol."

"Why don't you give him some time, let him figure out the truth." Tomoyo walked Sakura to the door. " I think that Syaoran is very confused. This morning, when I was looking out the window, I saw Syaoran looking at you, swimming. I've never seen a guy looking so miserable." She gave Sakura a playful nudge out the door. "Just go to him." she said.

Sakura walked on slowly. Behind her she heard Tomoyo close the door and there wasn't a single person in sight. Her bag was in the car and she'd said goodbye to Mei Lin. As if they had a will of their own, her feet carried her to the boathouse.

The boathouse was stationed at the end of the bay, where the three cottages stood. The door was open, the sound of her footsteps were lost in the sound of the sea crashing the waves against the shores. Syaoran's boat, named True Love rocked softly on the dark water, but Syaoran himself was nowhere in sight.

Relief and disappointment washed over her. She wanted to leave when she heard some noise above her head. Syaoran was in the attic of the boathouse. Hesitating she looked at her jeans and her white blouse. The attic was probably dusty and covered in spider-webs. It would be a waste of her clean clothes and freshly washed hair... oh well.

She climbed the stairs that lead her to the attic, which had one big window looking over the sea, and as expected it was really dusty. Syaoran was standing with is back facing her, looking out the window, lost in his own thoughts. Sakura opened her mouth to announce herself when she noticed a yellowish paper lying on the ground. It seemed familiar to her so she picked it up. It turned out to be a sketch she made, when she was 13 or 14, on a rainy day. Syaoran's father had given her free access to the boathouse and the attic had always been he favourite refuge. Back then she imagined how it would be to spend her honeymoon here and in her own childish way she drew a picture of the room, turning it into some kind of palace. While she was working on it, Syaoran came upstairs and asked her what she was doing and she answered dreamily: "Wouldn't it be great to spend the honeymoon here? With the bed under the window so you can see the stars at night..."

Syaoran grinned at her. "Is that what people on her honeymoon, according to you, do?"

She smiled; yeah she thought that that was what people did. How foolish of her. Sakura let the paper fall out of her hands. It rustled softly as it hit the ground, but Syaoran heard it.

"Ah," his voice sent shivers up her spine. "Look who's here..."

"I just came to say bye." she mumbled.

"Right." Ever so slowly he approached her and leaned against the wall close to her. "So you're off again?" the hostility in his eyes almost made her run...almost.

"Do you have work to do here?" she asked

"Yeah, did Eriol tell you?"

"Well I-"

"It has to be him. He was the only one I told."

Why was she so nervous? "Yeah, Eriol told me." she echoed.

"Why have you come?" he demanded

"Tomoyo said I should say bye to you."

"Why? Nobody's pointing a gun at your back." Now she knew. She could give him a 1000 chances but he would never grab the chance.

"Apparently it was a mistake!" she bit out and walked to the stairs. Syaoran's hand shot out and pulled her roughly towards him. Her face was close to his chest. She could smell his body scent... 'Leave,' she thought. 'I need to leave as soon as possible.'

"Well it's not your first, but it is your biggest mistake." he whispered in her ear. "Your timing couldn't be worse- from your point of view, but from mine, it couldn't have been better. You see I was just thinking of you..." with a thumping heart she looked up at him. "Of kissing..." he resumed his voice hoarse. Sakura licked her dry lips and Syaoran followed the movement of her tongue with his eyes. Moaning softly he took possession of her mouth. His tongue caressed hers. "Sweet..." Syaoran's voice trembled with pleasure. He stroked her hair with a trembling hand. "You smell delicious." His lips caressed her neck to her collarbone. "You taste delicious..." he whispered, "So delicious"

"Syaoran..." Sakura's voice sounded weird, even to her own ears. It was like she was floating, her common sense seemed to have dissolved into a dark fog of desire... It didn't last long. When Syaoran unbuttoned her blouse and she felt his warm breath between her breasts she returned to reality. An unidentifiable sound escaped her lips when she pulled herself away from him. Syaoran didn't try to take her back in his arms. Breathing heavily and irregular he leaned against the wall. With his hand he stroked his chest absentmindedly- as if trying to calm his racing heart.

With trembling hands she buttoned up her blouse.

"You were right." her voice was low and muffled. "I shouldn't have come here" She didn't look at him when she passed him by, trying to get to the stairs and he didn't do anything to stop her this time.

When she was halfway down the stairs she thought she heard him call her. But of course it was just her imagination. Syaoran just wanted to sleep with her. Loving her, no. He didn't even like her. The voice she thought that called her name sounded muffled with emotion, an emotion that could've been love. But that was just her imagination, because Syaoran may have feelings for her, but none of them were love...

**TBC**  
And thus ends another chapter! Review and tell me what ya think kay? Love you all and may the friggin' silver fork be with you!


	8. chapter 8

A/N 2007: You guessed it, again small changes. This time I changed some sentences though :P and took out some small errors and the note I put between the story

A/N: Okay, okay I know I'm late with updating this chapter too, but if you read my note you know why. If you haven't, I'll tell you now. I just got a new editor and she wanted to read the whole story before I posted this chapter. Anyway, of course my thanx go out to all those people that reviewed and those people who didn't review but read my story anyway. Okay here's chapter 8

**Chapter 8**

Sakura's apartment was located on the tenth floor of an apartment building. When she closed the, door late at night, she sighed, relieved.

'Finally home,' she thought.

She pulled off her shoes, went to her bedroom and put her bag on her bed. Grabbing a towel and a bathrobe, she went to the bathroom to take a nice long and hot shower.

After the long shower she walked to the kitchen and poured herself something to cold drink With a drink in her hand, she moved towards the living room. Her small bookcase was filled with books on how to cook. On top of the bookcase stood the answering machine. The red light was blinking, indicating that she got some messages. Sakura pushed the button and seated herself on the couch listening to the messages. While she was listening Sakura took small sips of her drink. Six people had called. As usual there was nothing exciting, they were all friendly chitchats. The guys were just good friends, not lovers.

But since Syaoran came waltzing back into her life, things weren't as calm as they were before. Her carefully built up balance could be disrupted by him. She felt shivers run down her spine by just thinking about him.

Quickly she put her glass down and stood up. She decided to call Naoko. Good thing she still had friends!

* * *

The week had passed all too soon for Sakura. It was yet again Friday. She was still sitting behind her desk at school, looking over some essays her students made. She sighed as she stopped checking them. There was a soft knock on the door and it slowly opened.

"You're still here?" asked the concierge.

"Yeah, but not for very long anymore. I'm calling it a night and I'm going to the cottage again,"

The concierge grinned. "Lucky you, but I'm gonna go right now, so do you mind locking the place up?"

"Nah," Sakura replied, "leave it to me."

"Great! Thanks! Have a nice weekend!" The concierge flashed her a smile and then disappeared.

Sighing Sakura looked back at the stack of papers. She didn't feel like checking and grading them anymore. Stuffing them in her back she walked out of the classroom, closed the door and locked it. Slowly she walked to the exit of the school, grabbing her coat on the way and locked the place up

When Sakura arrived at the lake, it was already dark. She drove the car to the driveway when she saw Syaoran walking. Her heart made a leap and her pulse quickened. She slowed down to take the curve but Syaoran stepped in front of the car and made a stop sign with his hand.

She cursed softly under her breath and hit the brakes. Syaoran walked towards her and tapped on the window. She opened the window of her car and looked up at him. He was leaning against the car and in the light of the dashboard they looked at each other.

Sakura wondered, by the look in his eyes, if he was thinking about their last meeting.

His voice, however, sounded distant and cold. "Mei Lin has already gone to bed," he said. "She was cooking and baking this morning. She's done way too much, so she decided to go to bed early. I was waiting for you to tell you not to wake her."

"She's not sick, is she?"

"No, she's just tired. She'll be fine in the morning."

He was standing so close that Sakura imagined she his felt his body warmth. She could smell his cologne and began to panic.

"Thank you for telling me." she said taking her foot off of the brake.

"Wait," he said and reached out his hand to the window, "Have you already eaten?"

"Yeah, on my way here. If you'll excuse me... I've had a very busy week and I'm tired." she replied.

"Why don't you stop by for a drink? I want to ask you something, Sakura."

"Why don't you ask me now?" she asked.

"Jesus, woman! Can't you just stop by for a drink without making a scene?" he bit out.

"Look who's talking," she taunted, "What's wrong anyway? Can't get a woman to satisfy you? Well if you're looking, just go to a whore, I'll look after Hao for you."

"Was I talking about sex? No, I was just inviting you for a drink." he said, trying to control his anger.

Sakura closed her eyes and rubbed her neck. "Sorry," she mumbled. "Just forget it. I'm really tired, but if you have something important to tell I'll come inside." She wanted to get her keys out of the contact but Syaoran stopped her by saying: "Never mind. I'm sorry too. I should've considered that you were tired. I won't keep you up any longer, Sakura. What I wanted to say is this: I've contacted an agency. There'll be some nannies coming by this week to try out for the job. I'm taking Hao with me to the city and I wanted to ask if you could look after him on Wednesday, so I'll have the opportunity to select a few."

Sakura looked at him, speechless. So he was coming back to live in Tomoeda, otherwise he wouldn't need a nanny. So what to do with the summer cottage? That could be put aside. What about her lífe? That's the main point. Syaoran back in Tomoeda, which meant she could bump into him any time of the day...O god!

"Can you arrange that for me, Sakura?"

Breathing a deep breath, she tried to gain control over emotions once again. "Does that mean that you'll be coming back to Tomoeda?"

"Yeah."

"And you're planning to go through with this?" Her voice turned cold and harsh. "After you've hired a nanny, will you go look for a mistress?" Syaoran took a step back, the moon illuminated his face. She saw the expression in his eyes: pain and frustration.

"Have you got a better proposal for me?" he asked cautiously.

"I think that Hao deserves a mother," she said resolutely. "A normal family life. What you're planning to do is heartless, businesslike and cruel. Heartless Syaoran! Not the best way to raise your child."

"So do I understand it clearly that you're not available to be Hao's nanny?"

'I'm available! I'd love to be the nanny! No problem with that.' her heart cried out, 'but with the mistress thing, no way I want that!!' She said out loud: "It'll be fun to spend some time with Hao. When can I expect you?"

"We'll leave on Tuesday and we'll be staying at the Hotel Halens. The first meeting is at 9 o'clock at the agency in Shini Lane."

"You can bring Hao at 8 o'clock then. I'll leave my address."

"Thanks, I really appreciate it." He took another step back. "Good night."

"Night Syaoran." Trying to make as little noise as possible, she drove to the parking lot. She stayed in the car a little while longer before getting out. She then walked towards the backdoor of the cottage. Suddenly she heard a scream, when she closed the door. She stood there, frozen and startled by the scream. What was that? It sounded like the scream of a child and it came from the direction of Syaoran's cottage. There, another scream from a child having a nightmare. She wanted to go there and comfort him, but he was Syaoran's child and his responsibility. She promised herself to spend as much time as possible with Hao, He needed a female person in his life, but not a nanny and not a mistress.

Hao needed tenderness, the warmth of the people that loved him. She and Mei Lin would offer him that.

* * *

"Mei Lin, Hao cried last night."

"Oh, poor boy." Mei Lin was sitting in her bed with a mug of steaming tea in her hands. Sakura walked to the window in the bedroom and looked outside. It was only 8 o'clock. The little Hiiragizawa's were playing with the water; Eriol was keeping an eye on them, while sitting on the raft and Tomoyo was probably cooking breakfast.

Would Syaoran make Hao's breakfast too? How was Hao? Should she have followed her maternal instincts last night? She sighed deeply.

"Something wrong?" Mei Lin asked. Sakura turned around. "No, not really. I heard Hao cry last night and I was wondering if I should've gone to check on them or not."

"Syaoran knows how to take care of himself, but the child is a whole different story." Mei Lin said. "I didn't see him much this week. I didn't feel too good. I convinced the others that I was standing in the kitchen too long, but the truth is that my stomach has been upset for the past few days. I can't seem to keep my food inside my stomach. But I'm feeling better today, so don't worry about that."

Sakura frowned. Mei Lin still didn't look too good. She was still a bit pale, but Mei Lin was as stubborn as always so she dropped the subject and instead she promised herself to help Hao, at least today.

"Sakura," Mei Lin broke her out of her train of thoughts, "Syaoran told me he wanted to sell his business in China and start a new one here. That's great news don't you think? And he's so kind. He thinks we should keep the cottage a few years longer. I can always catch a ride with him and Hao when I want to come here. Isn't this great?"

Sakura forced a smile. "Yeah. Would you like anything to eat?"

"No thanks. I think I'm going to sleep for a while, so I'll be feeling okay again tonight. You didn't forget about that did you?"

"No, of course I haven't."

"Good." Mei Lin put the mug on the nightstand and slipped under the blankets again. "So what are you going to do?"

"Clean the kitchen and go for a swim." Sakura pushed an auburn lock behind her ear. "Then I'll go look for Hao and try to get him to talk to me."

In her marine-blue bikini and a green towel swung over her shoulders, she walked out of the cottage, when she heard someone calling her.

"Pssst, Sakura" she turned around, looking for the person who called her. It was Eriol. He seemed to be hidden behind a tree and he motioned her to come over.

"Sakura," he whispered again, "I couldn't find Mei Lin yesterday so I couldn't bring the snacks over. I waited for you, but I didn't hear you coming. Did you arrive really late or something?"

"No," she answered, "But Syaoran was waiting for me and told me that Mei Lin wasn't feeling too good and that she had gone to bed early.

"Is she feeling better?"

"Yeah she's looking forward to the party."

"That's good to hear. Well anyway, can I put this in your fridge?"

'Sure follow me." and they walked back to the cottage. A few minutes later everything was put away in the fridge. Sakura said that he should keep the bag here to avoid suspicion. It was a surprise after all.

"Good idea." Eriol put the bag behind some crates. "You know, you would make a great criminal, Sakura, everything under control!"

They laughed merrily and walked out of the cottage, still laughing. Walking towards the tree Sakura stopped Eriol from walking away.

"Eriol," she said, "What if Mei Lin isn't feeling good enough to lure Tomoyo away? How will we surprise her then?"

Eriol leaned against the tree, a thoughtful expression on his face. "Well, you've got a point there..."

"Don't worry," Sakura cut in his train of thoughts. "Well think of something. We'll lie if necessary. Anything in the name of love!" she said.

The sound of footsteps approaching warned them that they weren't alone anymore.

Sakura turned around; her heart missed a beat when she saw Syaoran standing there.

His face was grim. "Well, well," he said with a cruel smile, "Look what we got here."

It could have been worse, but before Eriol or Sakura could say anything there was a loud yell: "Eriol Hiiragizawa, get your butt over here right now and eat your breakfast before I burn it!" the threat was followed by the laughter of the children.

"Morning Syaoran." Eriol looked at Sakura questioningly. She shook her head softly. Eriol relaxed. "I better get going now," he said laughing, "otherwise my wife will surely carry out her threat." and he walked away.

Left alone with Syaoran, she looked up at his face. It showed nothing but loathing for her.

"Morning to you too." she said. He stood there, in his swimming trunks, with a light-blue shirt covering his upper body. His amber eyes showed his fury.

"Excuse me," she said haughtily, "but I'm going for a swim."

And she quickly walked away, but Syaoran wouldn't let her off that easily. He followed her, with his long strides and walked with her to the water.

"How's Mei Lin?" he asked out of the blue.

"She's feeling better," Sakura answered, "and now she's resting in her room for the night. We're going out for dinner." Sakura looked at Cherry's Lodge, indicating that they would be eating there.

They didn't speak to each other anymore while they were walking, but the tension increased with every step they took. Sakura braced herself for what would come. Angrily she looked up at Syaoran when they reached the lake.

"It seems you follow my moves intentionally," she said. "Why?"

"You know damn well why!" he almost yelled. "How many times have I told you to stay away from Eriol? Haven't you caused enough trouble? Haven't you learned your lesson 8 years ago? When you acted like a slut by-"

Sakura felt like he punched her in the stomach. She looked at him defiantly.

"Since when have you become my guardian?" she bit out. "What I do isn't any of your business!"

"It is!" he raged, his voice becoming louder, "I've been friends with Tomoyo since I don't know when and I won't allow you to-"

"You don't have the right to say to me what to do, Syaoran Li! If I were you I would be looking after my son instead of spying on me! Hao needs you, I don't!"

When he paled she knew she had hit a sore spot. She ran away up to the pier and dove straight into the water.

'Syaoran is so blind!' she thought bitterly, while she swam towards the raft. He hurt her deeper than he could ever imagine.

He was a terrible man indeed. Then why did she still love him ?

**TBC...**  
Well that's it for chapter 8 folks! And I'm happy to announce that I've already started on chapter 9, so it'll probably be posted sooner than the last 2 chapters. And remember, review!!!! I love to know what the readers think of my little story! And it doesn't take much effort. Just press the little button there that says "go" and type something.


	9. chapter 9

A/N 2007: I keep repeating myself here, aren't I? Minor changes, not crucial to the story etc. etc.

A/N: Okaaaaaaaaayyyyy... Who thinks I'm a slow updater? If you think so raise your hand everybody raises their hand Yeah...sweatdrops Really sorry 'bout that. I guess I won't make any promises anymore about updating faster and stuff. But anyway... I'm going to France! Yes I'm participating in an exchange program and I get to spend a week or so in France. cheers for herself I'm gonna go very soon and I can hardly wait Thanx again to the people who reviewed and are still reading this story! You like me you really like me! Enjoy chapter 9 and don't forget to review

**Chapter 9**

Eriol took his children fishing the next morning and when they came back, he took Syaoran's son to the jeep. They stayed away all afternoon so Sakura hadn't gotten a chance to talk to Hao alone. So she promised herself she would talk to Hao tonight.

Eriol planned the party for six P.M. Sakura was blowing up balloons in the kitchen at 5 o'clock. She heard the door being opened by Mei Lin as she grabbed another balloon. Mei Lin walked into the kitchen and stood there for a while before asking: "Sakura, did you tell Syaoran that we're going out to Cherry's Lodge for dinner?"

"Not really... I might have given him the impression though..."

"He thinks so! And Eriol told Tomoyo that we were going to Julian's Place for dinner! But he wanted to take a nap first and told us to go take a walk, so he could have his peace." She winked at Sakura and raised her voice saying: "Sakura, I'm going for a walk with Tomoyo and Syaoran!"

"Very smooth Mei Lin," Sakura grinned, "Do you think you can keep them away for an hour or so?" she asked whispering.

"Leave it to me!" Mei Lin said and hit herself on the chest.

* * *

Eriol was working on the barbeque and Sakura hung up the last of the decorations. Descending down the ladder she said to Eriol: "Nice work," and grinned, "You're really good."

He grinned back, satisfied. "I've had some practice," he said, "Say, I'm thirsty. You want something to drink too? We've got beer, wine and Sprite."

"I'll take a Sprite, thank you."

"Coming right up!"

Eriol disappeared into the house and Sakura walked to the veranda searching if the others were coming. She saw them. Syaoran and Hao were walking together. The Hiiragizawa children were playing in the water. Mei Lin and Tomoyo were the last ones, walking slowly. Good. They would be the last to arrive. That meant that Eriol would have time to tell the others about the surprise party. Eriol put the Sprite in front of her. "You deserve it," he said. "Cheers!"

"Cheers." Sakura said and raised her Sprite in the air before taking a big gulp. "That feels good." she said satisfied, "So what are you going to give her?"

"The kids bought a CD for her, one she doesn't own yet, from her favourite singers Kero and Yue and my present for her is her favourite perfume: Nakuru"

"Tomoyo loves the artist Ruby Moon so I bought a painting for her. A replica of course. I'm not that rich to buy the real thing."

They talked a bit more. Sakura laughed at a joke Eriol made when she spotted some movement. When Syaoran's head was visible, her heart skipped a beat.

Little beats of sweat were visible on his face, as if he had run very fast, and his expression... it looked like the whole world was doomed because of his rage. Had he noticed that she crept to the Hiiragizawa's? That she was alone with Eriol? Here they went again!

"Hey Syaoran. You here?" she said her voice a bit shaky.

Eriol didn't seem to notice Syaoran's mood. "Hey! Want something to drink too?" he asked still grinning like a fool.

Syaoran ignored him and walked with threatening passes towards Sakura. She put the can of soda on a table and unconsciously took a few steps back.

"Syaoran... Eriol and I were just..." She held her breath, startled as Syaoran roughly grabbed her by the shoulders and steered her to the stairs.

"Get the hell away from here before Tomoyo returns!" He bit out. "How is it possible? Where do you get you sick little courage? Mei Lin and Tomoyo are gone for a few minutes and suddenly you appear here!" He looked at Eriol, a gaze full of loathing directed to him. "Hiiragizawa, you just needed to take a nap didn't you?" he sneered.

Eriol had apparently understood what was going on. His eyes were shooting daggers. "You're sick, Syaoran! Good Lord this is Tomoyo's birthday for crying out loud. Sakura and I organized a surprise party for her. If you would just take a minute. " He pushed Syaoran. Syaoran didn't count on that and he let go of Sakura. Sakura lost her balance and fell against Syaoran's chest. Automatically he put his arms around her.

For a few seconds she savoured the feeling of his hands on her back and hearing his heartbeat... Her legs started to tremble. Even in this kind of situation he managed to affect her. The bitterness welled up in her and she pulled herself out of his embrace.

"Syaoran Li," she said looking at him furiously, "You are a rare fool. Do you always have to think the worst of other people? Look around you, then you can see what Eriol and I have been doing!"

He did just that and she heard a soft intake of breath when he saw the balloons and the other decorations, not to mention the barbeque and the table that had been set out. You could see by the blinking of his eyes that he understood his mistake. She almost felt sorry for him... Almost!

He cleared his throat. "Sorry Hiiragizawa," he said, "It seems I've jumped to conclusions this time."

"It doesn't just seems, it's what you did!" Eriol's voice was thick with anger. "Don't waste your time apologizing to me. Apologize to Sakura!"

"Never mind," Sakura mumbled. They heard approaching footsteps. "Can I go in and freshen myself up a bit, Eriol?"

"Sure."

A few minutes later she emerged out of the house and she saw that everyone was here except for Mei Lin and Tomoyo. Eriol had filled the kids in about the surprise-party by the looks of it; they were practically glowing with excitement, even Hao. Syaoran was standing by the door; his profile clearly visible against the sky. He had a wonderful profile...she had to swallow only by looking at him.

She reached out her hand to open the door, but he seemed to have been waiting for her and sprang into action. He opened the door for her and said in a soft voice: "Sakura, I-"

With her chin raised in the air, she walked passed him like he was air. He didn't need to apologize anymore, it was too late. The guy was simply possessed by the thought that something was going on between her and Eriol. And even if it was true, it wasn't any of his business. She glanced back; he was looking at her, with a smouldering look in his eyes. She turned her back on him, not wanting to see him in her eyesight.

"Yes a glass of Coke please." she heard Mei Lin say, who just walked up the stairs. She winked at Eriol and went to go stand next to Sakura.

A few seconds later Tomoyo appeared. When she saw the whole bunch together she stood there, caught by surprise. "What's going on? I-"

That was all that was heard because right after that seven voices cried out: "Surprise!" Tomoyo's surprised little scream was lost in the congratulations and cheering.

* * *

Sakura had no trouble in avoiding Syaoran, because he was carefully staying out of her way. After a while she began to relax as the tension seeped out of her body and she began enjoying herself.

The party was a big success and Tomoyo got a lot of gifts. Even Syaoran got her something. Tomoyo was overly happy with her presents and gave everyone a kiss on the cheek.

Around eight o'clock, after the dishes were done, when the older people where drinking coffee, Sakura noticed that Hao wasn't playing with the Hiiragizawa children. She went in search of him and found him on the beach behind Li's cottage.

"Hey Hao. Feeling up for a walk?" she asked casually.

"No thanks." he mumbled without looking up.

"Too bad, because I missed you this morning," she said, "I needed to help Mr. Hiiragizawa, you see. You sure you don't want to come?"

He shook his head. After a small hesitation Sakura sat beside him, but he still wasn't looking at her. He was looking at a speedboat on the lake.

"What a noise those things make," Sakura mumbled, "I like your daddy's boat better." He didn't answer. She let her hands dangle between her legs, thinking about how to get him to talk. "I was around your age when I came here for the first time. And. I just lost my mother..."

Hao didn't say a word; he kept staring at the lake. His profile was turned to her so she couldn't see the expression in his eyes. She took a large gulp of air before continuing to talk to the boy. "My mother was a teacher and my father an archeologist. One time they won a vacation to France. I believe it was a ski resort. Anyway, my parents rarely had any free time so this vacation was a blessing for them. I could stay at my cousin's house and my parents took a few weeks off. On the last day of their vacation, my mom fell ill to an unknown disease and died. It was quite a blow for my father and me. I don't think he ever recovered from it and a year later he died of a broken heart. Sonomi, Tomoyo's mom, was the first to take me here. I was a very sad little girl back then." Tears were threatening to spill out of her eyes as she told the young boy her story- she remembered how lonely she was back then. She looked at Hao.

He was still staring at the lake; by the looks of it he hadn't heard a thing. Oh well, what was she expecting? If his own father couldn't get through to him, well then she wouldn't either. With a sigh she reseated herself. At that moment Hao stood up and prepared to leave. She reached out to him and grabbed his hand. "Hao," she said hastily, "I'm sorry if I-"

Suddenly he turned around to face her. You could see his eyes behind his glasses, shining with unshed tears.

"C'mere." she pulled him down, so he was sitting next to her. "It'll get better in time." she said softly, "Really Hao. After a while it won't hurt so much anymore. You'll see..."

He cried in Sakura's arms. Finally he pulled off his glasses and dried his tears with his fists. "Your daddy died too?" he asked, his voice shaky.

Sakura nodded. "Yes, he did."

He put his glasses back on and looked at Sakura. "You're pretty," he whispered, "I've never seen such pretty eyes."

Sakura blushed and cleared her throat. "You're pretty too, you know." she said, "If you were 20 years older I'm sure I would've fallen head over heels in love with you." She got up. "So how about that walk?" she asked. When he nodded she added: "Tell it to your dad. I don't want him to worry about where you went."

She saw him nod again and then he dashed of to find his father. A few minutes later he returned alone; Sakura didn't expect it any other way. Syaoran apologized but apparently he found that enough. It was fine by her! Then why was she feeling a bit disappointed when Hao returned alone?

Hao looked up at her. "Daddy says it's going to get colder, so I have to get a shirt to wear first."

"That's okay," she answered, "and let's get you some shoes too." They both walked towards Li's cottage to get the stuff that Hao needed.

As they emerged from the cottage again, with Hao wearing a white shirt and sandals, he asked: "Can we go that way?" And he pointed in a direction. "Seiichi says that the squirrels play there at night."

"Sure." Together they walked in silence and the passed Syaoran's jeep. She saw that there was wood lying in the car. "Your father's going to work on the boathouse?" Sakura asked.

"Yeah, the walls are rotting away. He's going to make new ones and I can help him. He's going to teach me how to fish too." Hao told her, "We'll be going to Tomoeda on Wednesday and he says that I can stay at your house in the morning. What are we going to do?"

"Well what would you like to do? Maybe we could go to the zoo."

"Mommy doesn't like... didn't like that. She said that it's filthy and dirty there. Oh look! A squirrel!" and immediately he began to chase the little animal. Sakura's warning that he should watch out for tree roots came too late. He fell, face forward, on the moss. Sakura picked up his glasses and asked if he'd hurt himself.

"No, but the squirrel is gone." he said gloomily. Suddenly he gasped, startled. "My shirt's dirty! Look, green smudges everywhere!" his bottom lip trembled, "mommy said that I-"

Sakura knelt next to him and took him in her arms. "Hao, it doesn't matter if you get dirty. Why do you think they invented soap and washing machines? And how do you think we feel when we're having fun and getting dirty while you are as clean as can be? Look..." she rubbed her hand over the moss and then over the soil. Finally she lifted her now dirty hand. "Watch this." with her dirty hand she rubbed over her silk blouse and she heard him gasp again when dirty smudges began to appear on her blouse. She pushed his hand on the moss. "Now it's your turn."

He did as he was told, tentatively. Apparently he misunderstood, because he lifted his dirty hand to her blouse."

"No, on your own shirt, Hao."

His eyes widened slightly- suddenly the corners of his mouth curled up into a smile. "Look at me!" he said, while rubbing his hand over his shirt. He sounded proud.

Sakura swallowed. "Fun isn't it?" she asked laughing, "Now, you don't always have to get dirty on purpose, but if it's an accident it doesn't matter."

"Oh," he mumbled. "Can we keep a moss fight?"

"A moss fight?" Sakura repeated surprised.

"Yeah, we throw moss at each other. Miyuki said she does that a lot. It gets stuck in your hair and stuff..."

Sakura grabbed a chunk of moss and threw it to him. He yelled fiercely and began throwing moss too. At a certain point Sakura acted as if she was scared and ran away, making her collide into a broad chest of a man.

On instinct she grabbed the blue shirt the guy was wearing to steady herself and she looked up, straight into Syaoran's eyes.

"Syaoran..." her voice suddenly sounded weak. "What are you doing here? What do you want?"

"What do you think I want, Sakura?" his gaze was resting hungrily on her mouth. "I came to apologize."

Sakura looked into his amber eyes and it seemed as if she was drowning in a sea of pure desire. "Apology accepted." she said hoarsely.

She was leaning towards him and he towards her when Hao suddenly appeared and said: "Aunt Sakura?" She held her breath and stepped out of his embrace. Hao stood next to them and looked up cautiously. "Are you going to tell daddy about getting dirty?" he asked, "About that it doesn't matter? Right Aunt Sakura?"

Sakura noticed that Syaoran was breathing hard too, just like her, but otherwise he looked unaffected. He looked at Hao, raised an eyebrow and went over the smudges on Hao's shirt with his finger. "What's this?" he asked.

"Dirt." Sakura answered. "I found that it was time to introduce Hao to dirt and how to get dirty."

"We had a moss fight!" he exclaimed and giggled. "And I was winning!"

"A moss fight? Why didn't you tell me? I wanted to play too!" Syaoran pouted. "Just you wait, I'm going to get you and then I'm going to throw you into the water with shirt and all!"

"First you got to catch me!" Hao ran away screaming and laughing as he looked back over his shoulder.

"..." Syaoran looked at his son incredulously, "This is the first time I hear him laughing since Misha has died. How did you do it?"

Sakura shrugged and folded her arms in front of her chest. "Talked... I told him about my parents and after that everything just came out."

"Daddy! Come on!" Hao whined from far away.

Tears were stinging in Sakura's eyes. "Go." she urged him and gave him a little push. "Hao needs you." Syaoran hesitated for a moment; then he took Sakura's hand and dragged her with him.

"If I'm going to throw him into the water," he said running, "you're going to follow him, because you're a real troublemaker!"

"No, Syaoran!" she giggled. It wouldn't be the first time she would be thrown into the water, but back then she was a teen.

Hao was running on the shore, shouting and laughing. Syaoran grabbed him in a matter of seconds and threw him into the water. Hao laughed merrily and he laughed even harder when Sakura was thrown into the too. Spluttering her head emerged from the water and she mock-glared at the two who were standing on the shore, laughing at her. The father and son had finally found each other.

* * *

After a shower Sakura dressed herself in some dry jeans and a gray shirt and went back to the party. Hao and Syaoran weren't back yet, and she looked forward to...Syaoran.

Hao ran ahead to put dry clothes on. They followed him in a slower pace. They hardly talked to each other, but in one way or another, something clicked between them. Something old and new at the same time.

Sakura tried to define it. There was this kind of harmony, but that had always existed between them. So what was new? Something she couldn't name, something exciting.

She was talking to Eriol and Tomoyo when she heard his footsteps. She was standing with her back towards the stairs and she had to control herself from turning around immediately.

"Where's Hao?" she heard Miyuki ask.

Eriol and Tomoyo looked at Syaoran and Sakura turned around... Syaoran was smiling at Miyuki.

"Hao was taking a long time with washing and dressing," Syaoran told laughing, "When I went to check on him, he was lying in his bed, sleeping like a rock."

Mei Lin yawned. "I think I'm going to hit the sack too." she announced, standing up. "Tomoyo, thank you for the party."

"Don't thank me," Tomoyo said laughing, "Thank Eriol and Sakura. They did all the work."

Eriol draped his arm around Sakura's shoulders. "We make an excellent team don't we?" he asked grinning.

At that moment Sakura's gaze drifted to Syaoran. He was glaring at Eriol's arm. It was obvious he didn't like the arm that was draped over her shoulders. He was practically burning it with his gaze. And suddenly Sakura felt tired. Syaoran did apologize but he still thought that there was something going on between Eriol and her.

"Come, Mei Lin." she said. "We're going together." she smiled at Tomoyo. "It was a fun party."

"Are you leaving too?" Tomoyo asked surprised.

"Yeah, I'll see you tomorrow."

"Good night, Sakura." Sakura tensed when she hears Syaoran's voice so near.

"Good night." she whispered

"Good night Syaoran!" Mei Lin said happily. "It's nice to have you here, don't you think Sakura?"

Sakura ignored the question and walked down the stairs with Mei Lin in front of her. "He's suffering from a great deal of pain and sorrow." said Mei Lin as they walked to their cottage. "He's unhappy."

"Mei Lin, I think I've made progress with Hao." Sakura said. "They've had a lot of fun by the water. Syaoran said he hadn't heard Hao laugh like that ever since... since Misha died."

"I saw you playing. You were like a family..." she mumbled. "Like a family should be in my eyes."

Sakura swallowed. "Mei Lin, Syaoran doesn't like me," she pushed the door open, "You know that."

Mei Lin looked at her, her eyes unusually bright. "Oh he likes you alright! He has always liked you. To be honest I always thought-"

"What did you thought?" Sakura stood in the doorway.

"Mei Lin smiled melancholic smile, "Oh it was just a dream... If Misha never showed up, Syaoran could've fallen in love with you."

Sakura followed Mei Lin inside. What would she say if she dreamt exactly the same thing? What a foolish dream! 'I am a man who's meant for only one woman.' Syaoran told her. 'And Misha's the one for me.'

Misha's now dead and Syaoran would never love again. He wouldn't let himself love anyone else, he made that clear. He would rather look for a woman who would satisfy his sexual needs.

Mei Lin was right: Syaoran was a very unhappy person. Sakura could only hope that the road he chose would eventually make him happy again...

**TBC...**

Sorry if this chapter sucked. Did anyone notice that halfway in writing this chapter I got writer's block? calls out to her muse Oh muuuuuuuuse, where are you? pouts because her muse refuses to show up Anyway I'll write chapter 10 when I get back from France. I'm going this Sunday and I can hardly wait(Holland's time line)! Well don't forget to review!! Thank you for reading my rambling


	10. chapter 10

A/N 2007: Same old story ) minor changes and corrections. Changed the movie title into my fave movie of this year XD

A/N: Eep! Don't kill me! runs and ducks behind some garbage cans I know I know I'm late cough, cough with updating, but it's better than not updating at all right? Anyway I wanna thank all the people who are still with me and reviewed! You people are great! I love you all! And I wanna thank my super-duper greatest best friend/ editor/ inspiration Melalyenye! I couldn't have done this without her! Okay on to the fic!

**Chapter 10**

The next day Sakura succeeded in avoiding Syaoran. She said her good-byes to Mei Lin and Hao, fished her keys out of her pocket and walked towards the door... when she saw him.

"Hi." he said standing in the open doorway. "I came here to ask where you live, if you're still interested in looking after Hao for a day."

"Of course." Sakura didn't ask him to come in, but he did it anyway. She had already written her address on a paper and stuck it to the fridge, together with a note that said 'for Syaoran Li'. She took it off the fridge and gave it to him.

"Here. The school where I work is on the corner and Tomoyo's office is a few streets further." She grabbed the keys that she'd dropped on the table. She gave Syaoran her address and looked at him impatiently.

"Are you leaving?" He pocketed the paper in his old faded jeans, taking a step forward doing it.

"Yeah," she answered stiffly. The kitchen was suddenly becoming too small for the two of them and he was standing too close for her comfort.

Her keys slipped out of her sweaty hands. She crouched down to pick them up, but Syaoran was faster. When they stood up again she could feel his breath tickling her ear as he bent towards her and said: "Okay. I'll see you Wednesday."

He took her hold of her wrist and laid the keys in her open hand before curling her fingers over them. Sakura stood there, looking at him as he did that. Her hand felt all tingly where he had touched it. Her heart was racing as he did it. Finally she managed to get control over her body again as she pulled her hand back and managed a soft "Thanks."

"It was my pleasure."

"Well, I'll be going then." Panic made her voice crack. She pushed him out of the way and quickly hurried over to the exit.

"Hey!" he called after her "Do you mean going or running?" The mocking echo of his words echoed in her head as she was hurrying towards her car.

* * *

The weather in Tomoeda was hot and humid on Tuesday. Rain was approaching for days and on Wednesday it finally came. When Sakura opened the door for Syaoran and Hao the rain began to pour.

"No zoo today, Hao. I'm sorry," she said. "We'll have to think of something else."

"Maybe I can watch TV." Hao pushed his glasses up with a gesture that Sakura began to love.

"Morning Sakura," came the voice of Syaoran. Sakura hadn't looked at him yet, but now she had to. He wore a dark-blue tailored suit and a white dress-shirt with a striped tie; in short, he looked dashingly handsome as always.

"Morning." Her breath caught in her throat as their eyes met. Would she be confronted again with his mocking, knowing challenge? Looking deeper into his eyes made her realize that he wouldn't. Relieved she led her guests to the living room.

Syaoran walked straight to the large window in the room and looked at the sky.

"This is going to be a large storm." he said. "But it should be over by three o' clock this afternoon." Hao walked towards his father and peered out the window as well.

"Is that the sea?" he asked pointing towards the water.

"No, that's just the Maas. The sea is further away."

Sakura looked at them. 'They seemed to be getting along fine.' she thought and opened the closet to put Hao's coat away.

As she re-entered the room she asked at what time Syaoran thought to be done.

"They've got six candidates. My last interview is at one o'clock so shall we say two?"

"Fine by me."

"Okay." his amber eyes trailed down from her face and rested on her bosom. She could feel her cheeks warming and she quickly walked into the hall and opened the door to hide it from him.

Syaoran ruffled Hao's hair affectionately. "Behave while you're here, okay?"

"I will dad. See you later."

Sakura gripped the handle on the door tightly and opened the door so wide that she practically pushed herself into the wall as Syaoran passed her in the small hall.

"How long have you been living here?" he asked, looking around.

"Almost five years."

"Really? I like what you've done to your place." he praised. "Do you have one or two bedrooms?"

"One." Sakura's eyes drifted unconsciously toward the door on Syaoran's left side.

"May I?" without waiting for an answer he pushed the door open. He looked at the small room standing in the doorway. He looked around a bit without saying a word, which made Sakura uncomfortable. She hated he way he'd make her feel uncomfortable without a good reason. "Only a single bed. I thought..." he silenced himself.

"What? What did you think?" Sakura knew fully what he was referring to.

He shrugged. "That you had a double bed."

"For people that... would stay. You mean?" she forced out a light laugh. "Don't worry your head about it. I'm prepared for anything."

"I wasn't worried. I was just... mildly surprised. When I saw your bedroom I was wondering what was wrong with it."

'The only think that's wrong is your image of me,' Sakura thought, but refrained from speaking it out loud. Instead she made a show of looking on her watch and said: "It's getting late."

He looked at her again and frowned.

"You're looking a bit pale." He placed his hand on her forehead. The soft pressure made her blush. "Nothing..." he said and took is hand away. "Blushes on your cheeks... I better go now."

Sakura slammed the door closed behind him and leaned against it with closed eyes. How much longer could she keep this up? How much longer before she fell into his arms?

* * *

Syaoran returned at a quarter to two. Hao was lying on the sofa watching the TV and Sakura was in the kitchen when the buzzer went off. She pressed the button while saying: "Your father's back."

There was no answer and she looked into the living room. Hao was immersed in a program on TV.

"Your father's back." she repeated. "Will you go get the door when he knocks?"

"Okay." Hao walked towards the hall, while glancing over his shoulders at the TV.

Sakura walked back into the kitchen. A few moments later Syaoran appeared in the kitchen. Hao was sitting in front of the TV again.

"And?" she asked. "How was your day?"

"Fine." he answered. He looked around shortly as if he'd noticed something. "Is that coffee I smell?"

"Yes. Do you want some?"

Syaoran took off his coat and sat down at the table. "Yes thanks."

Sakura poured two cups and gave one to him. She then proceeded to dump three spoons of sugar and some milk in her own cup before asking: "Find somebody?"

Syaoran eyed her cup of coffee before shrugging it off and taking a sip of his own. "Two actually." he answered. "I've made another appointment with them so they can meet Hao." Syaoran paused, taking another sip. "Sakura, I was wondering if you could help me. Maybe you'll notice something I've overlooked."

"This afternoon?" she thought about it and began shuffling a bit with her plans. " I can make some time, I guess."

'Thanks, I appreciate it a lot." absently he plucked a grape out of the fruit-bowl. "So what did you and Hao do?"

"We went to a movie called 'Transformers' and after the movie we grabbed something to eat at 'La Place' on Hao's insistence." she placed her cup down, having finished her coffee. "What time is the first meeting?"

"At five o'clock. The next one is at six."

"Here." she gave him a pen and paper. "Write down the address. I'll appear a little to five."

He took the paper and pen and scribbled the address down. While he was scribbling Sakura looked at his broad shoulders... She could see the well-trained muscles move and the strong arms of him-

"There." Syaoran looked up; he narrowed his eyes. "What's wrong?"

"Wh-What do you mean?" she stuttered.

"You were thinking of something... someone. You were looking dreamy. Who were you thinking of?"

Sakura felt the tension rise. "I- I wasn't thinking of someone. I was just thinking about stuff I have to do..." she noticed Syaoran didn't believe her. She turned around, blushing furiously and walked towards the door.

She was almost there when Syaoran grabbed her arm and closed the door with his foot. The click of the lock was hardly noticeable above the noise of the TV. Helplessly Sakura looked up at Syaoran.

"Don't look at me like that." he whispered. "I won't bite unless..." his voice became husky, "unless you want me to."

Before Sakura could say anything he pulled her towards him and kissed her. He opened his mouth and let his tongue slide over her bottom lip, coaxing her into opening her mouth and she willingly obliged, letting his tongue explore her mouth, while she explored his.

All too soon Syaoran pulled away and left Sakura in a state of daze. Syaoran let her go and she leaned against the door, breathing heavily.

"Right..." Syaoran mumbled. Sakura glanced up to see that the kiss hadn't left him untouched either. "So I guess you don't mind being bitten, but it won't happen in the kitchen." he continued, "When the time comes I want to see your hair spread out on a pillow, laying on you back in my bed, with your beautiful green eyes looking at me..."

She wanted to shout 'shut up!' to him but the words got stuck in her throat. She could hardly breathe! With a lot of effort she managed to move away from the door to lean on the wall and made a weak hand-gesture towards the door.

He got the message and with one last lust-filled look at her, he grabbed his coat and left the kitchen.

"See you later auntie Sakura!" she heard Hao say and a few seconds later the door closed.

She let herself slide to the ground, Syaoran's words ringing in her ears. She wanted it... oh how she longed for it, but that was all Syaoran wanted. The sex. And what about love?

* * *

The first nanny was worthless. Sakura didn't notice it immediately. SiYi Zing looked like any good nanny. She was cheerful, energetic, dressed properly and kind. But when she opened her bag to look for a handkerchief Sakura noticed a small bottle of booze.

After Miss Zing left Syaoran took off his coat.

"We've got about 20 minutes before the next candidate arrives." he said.

"There's a park across the street. Can we go there?" Hao asked.

"Why not?" Syaoran looked at Sakura. "If that's okay with you."

"Sounds good." she replied.

It was hot. Sakura was glad she wore a sleeveless dress made out of a light fabric. There were a lot of trees in the park and soon they were standing under one of them, looking for the comfort of the shadow.

"Dad, can I go and buy and ice-cream?" Hao asked at Syaoran and Sakura sat down on the bench.

"Where? Syaoran asked.

"Over there" Hao pointed towards a wagon standing next to the pond in the park.

"I don't know..."

"Please! I'll even get you and auntie Sakura one!" Hao begged.

Syaoran grinned. "Alright then." he got out his wallet and gave Hao some money. "I'll have a vanilla and Sakura?" he looked at her.

"None for me." she simply said.

"Okay. One vanilla for dad and a chocolate for me!" He smiled brightly before running off to the wagon selling the ice cream.

"Miss Zing isn't any good." Sakura said as soon as Hao was out of hearing range. "She drinks."

Syaoran turned his head to look at her, but didn't ask anything. After a while he just shook his head. "Let's hope the other is better then."

Sakura nodded, not looking at him. For a while there was a amiable silence between them.

"Have you told aunt Mitsumi about your plans?"

"Yes I've written her a letter."

"Could she and Hao get along?"

He snorted. "You know your aunt. Can you imagine her getting along with anyone?"

"No." Sakura agreed. "I remember grandma telling me how aunt Mitsumi offered to raise me up when my parents died, but luckily my grandma could put a stop to that idea. I remember the vacations with my aunt... terrible! Still, grandma insisted on keeping in touch, since she's family"

"But what about your cousin? I always got the impression that you-"

"You're ice-cream dad!" Hao said happily licking his own. His timing couldn't have been better for Sakura. The last thing she wanted to talk about was her relationship with her cousin Misha.

Hao gave Syaoran his change back and then asked if could go to the swings. Syaoran agreed but told Hao to stay somewhere where he could see him and then sat down next to Sakura again. She resisted the urge to scoot a away as far as the bench would allow.

"Want a lick?" He held the cone in front of her nose.

Sakura knew he was expecting her to refuse the offer so she said: "Why thank you, Syaoran." She'll show him! She wasn't just a weak woman.

She grabbed his wrist, giving him one of her seductive smiles and leaned towards him. With the tip of her tongue she swept over the ice cream while looking at him flirtatiously.

"Mmm..." she moaned.

Suddenly Syaoran pulled his wrist loose from her grasp and grabbed her hand.

"That good huh? My turn then." He lowered his head to the ice cream, his eyes never leaving hers and then, he let his tongue sweep over the ice cream. Sakura shivered, thinking what that tongue could do to her body.

Syaoran looked surprised. "Cold?" he asked the corners of his mouth turning upwards. He let go of Sakura's hand and leaned back, but kept his face turned to her.

With effort Sakura managed to smile. "On the contrary... I can barely stand the heat-"

"Oh what a lovely couple you two make!" an old woman cried out seeing the two of them on the bench

Sakura looked up and opened her mouth to correct the woman but Syaoran beat her to it.

"Why thank you ma'am." He smiled at her.

"Oh if only my Henry was alive" the woman sighed. "But I can tell that you two are deeply in love!" she continued. "You two are soulmates! I just know it!"

Sakura resisted the urge to laugh maniacally. 'Soulmates. If only.' she thought and smiled politely at the woman. 'And love? There is no love coming from him.'

"In any way, don't ever let go of each other! Love like yours is so hard to find." the woman came closer and gave their entwined hands a friendly pat. "You should marry her, young man." she winked at him. "And you, young lady, make sure you say yes when he proposes." And with that she walked away, looking back at them every now and then.

"Let's go shall we?" She got up and went to Hao before Syaoran could reply or comment about the old woman.

* * *

Alysha Nox was Dutch and just moved to Tomoeda. Her certificate was excellent. The last family she worked for was related to the dynasty.

After the interview Syaoran promised he would give her a call to tell her his decision.

"So what do you think of her?" He asked Sakura when she was gone.

"She seems to have what is needed." Sakura answered, "Hao what did you think of Miss Nox?" she asked the little boy.

"She's nice."

"Do you like her better than Miss Zing?" his father wanted to know.

"Miss Zing smelled funny." and he scrunched up his nose at the thought.

Sakura laughed softly. "You didn't need me. So will you be hiring her?"

"Yes, I'll call her tomorrow to let her know. I could have told her today, but I wanted to get your opinion first."

"She gets my vote. Now all you need to do is find a mistress. Need my help with that too, Syaoran?" Sakura could bite her tongue off. How could she say something like that and ruin the whole day? Syaoran looked at her as if he was thinking the same thing.

"No I can handle that one my own." he finally said. "Shall I drive you home?"

"No, I'm here with my own car." Sakura wanted to leave as soon as possible.

"Alright then. See you this weekend."

"No, I won't be coming."

He frowned. "I'm certain that Mei Lin said you would be dining at Cherry's Lodge. Am I mistaken?"

"I told Mei Lin that we would go on a Saturday but not this Saturday."

"But she's counting on it."

"Damn... well I guess I'll see you this weekend then. Bye Hao, I really enjoyed today."

He pushed his glasses up. "I really liked today too." he said earnestly.

"See you." Syaoran said to Sakura when she walked away. Sakura made a vague wave with her hand without looking back. Her mind was busy with something else. She would make sure she was busy on Friday. So busy that she had to call Mei Lin and tell her she wouldn't be finished till eleven that evening. It would be too late to drive there all by herself in the dark, Mei Lin would say. And Sakura would obey, without any objections and say she would be arriving the day after...

**TBC... **  
Well finally chapter 10 is out! Please leave a nice review for me? I'm craving reviews! If I don't get any I might die! Yes I am review depraved. sniffles Okay till the next chapter!

Oh and if anyone is interested, the name SiYi is Chinese


	11. chapter 11

A/N 2007: it seems like I'm always apologizing in every chapter I post…. Oh well, again: minor changes, nothing big )

A/N: Aaaaah! I'm sorry it took so long! I was planning on uploading it a week ago, but my mom threw away my chapter! I was so upset! And I had to rewrite the whole chapter 11 A/B. That's why this chapter is so short I still have a piece to write. Damn it! I hate it when she comes into my room. Now to answer a few questions:

Sakuralova - I have absolutely no idea. Though I think the end is coming soon. I've been dragging it out too long.

Sparklyaura and whatevea - I'm not sure about Syao's pov yet. I'll see what I can do.

Nadja - You are right! You're the only person who noticed, as far as I know. Kudos to you!

Jennifer - Well, rating is pg-13 and I don't think I'm going to put in any lemon. I have no trouble reading them, but writing is a whole different matter to me!

Denize - How did you figure it out? I admit it's pretty obvious but still... Go you!

And to all the others: Thank you for reviewing! I really love you guys! Keep them coming!

Oh and my editor is yet again on vacation. Dammit! I really need to find a sub for her in times like these. And if you want to be notified when I update, please say so in your review and leave an email-address I've lost track of the people I would notify, not to mention I'm a slack in the update apartment ;;

**Chapter 11**

Sakura was glad she could leave Tomoeda on Saturday. Last Friday was simply too much. She had a lot of work to complete next to a few meetings and wasn't finished 'till eleven p.m. Once she got home she was so tired that she went to bed immediately.

Now she was on the road driving towards the cottage, while listening to the radio.

She was in a good mood, but the mood disappeared when she arrived at the cottage and saw Syaoran standing there, as if waiting for her.

He was wearing a pair of black swimming trunks. With his tanned skin, broad shoulders and small hips he could pose for a magazine. Sakura could hit herself for drooling all over him. She tried to keep her gaze on his face but Syaoran's piercing amber eyes took her breath away. So she redirected her gaze elsewhere.

She pushed the door to her car closed with her hip, while carrying the big paper bag with groceries.

"Hi," she said.

"You're looking nice today, Sakura. Had a nice trip?"

"Yeah. What do you want Syaoran? I mean... do you want to tell me something?"

"Actually, yes. Mei Lin is out together with Tomoyo and Miyuki. She asked me to tell you she'd be back around two o'clock."

"Thanks for telling." Sakura lifted the bag of groceries in front of her like a shield. "Where's Hao?"

"He and Mamoru have become friends. Right now they're painting a few planks for me. I've just fixed the boathouse and I was on my way to fetch some drinks. Want anything?"

'Yes, you!' she thought but didn't say it out loud. "Eh... no thanks. I want to be alone for a while."

"Busy week? Why don't you go swimming? I hear it works very relaxing." he advised, "I haven't tried it myself yet, because I have to watch my painters. Go change in your bikini Sakura. I'll wait for you at the raft."

Sakura frowned. "I wasn't planning on-"

"Something happened." his face turned grim. "I need to talk to someone." And abruptly he walked away. Sakura looked at him as he walked away. What could've happened? Something with Hao maybe? No, Syaoran looked angry... drowned in her own thoughts she walked with the groceries to the cottage. Mei Lin had put some ice tea in the fridge. Sakura poured herself a big glass of it and walked to her bedroom to get changed.

While she changed into her bikini she drank her tea. A few minutes later she swam to the raft.

* * *

"Misha's mother threatened me with a lawsuit. She wants custody over Hao."

Sakura sat cross-legged on the raft and looked at Syaoran with unbelieving eyes. "Are you serious? When did you find out?"

"My lawyer called me yesterday."

Sakura scrambled up. "But why? What reasons does aunt Mitsumi have?"

Syaoran's mouth contorted into a grim line "the reason is the fact that I'm moving to Tomoeda."

"I understand that she'll miss her grandson but to have custody over him... she can't do that, can she? I mean you're Hao's father and she's just..."

"She says I'm a workaholic and that I don't make time for my child."

"What does your lawyer say? Surely he knows how to handle this? Aunt Mitsumi won't stand a chance."

"That's the thing... she isn't completely wrong. My work was everything to me a few years back." he admitted.

Sakura sensed a weird tension in him; she had the feeling he wasn't telling her everything and suddenly she didn't feel at ease anymore. She was surprised that he had neglected Hao. So what was the story behind it all?

"My lawyer warned me that I shouldn't imagine things," he continued, "it's all up to the judge. According to my lawyer there's only one thing I can keep custody."

"How? What do you have to do?" she asked curiously.

Syaoran turned away. "He advised me to look for a wife." he waved his fist in the air. "But I don't want to marry ever again!"

Sakura walked on trembling legs to the edge of the raft, as far away from Syaoran as possible and looked over the lake.

Why was life so hard? The first problem wasn't solved and already there was another.

'Syaoran must be feeling miserable.' In spite of the heat she shivered. 'If only I could help him.' She turned around. "What are you going to do?" she wanted to know.

After a while he answered: "I will find someone, I think."

"You mean... you're just going to marry someone only for Hao's sake?"

"Not 'only for' Sakura. Never. Hao deserves the best."

"I didn't mean it that way. You know that."

"I know... But if it means keeping my son, then yes. I will marry someone. But where..." his voice faltered.

While minutes passed, Sakura's mind formed an insane idea. She rejected the idea immediately. But the idea kept coming back. No, she could never do that! But she wanted to help Syaoran so badly...

There was a way out of the lawsuit, but that meant that she had to marry Syaoran. There would be no time to waste, aunt Mitsumi would try to get things done as soon as possible, Sakura knew that. Where would Syaoran get a suitable wife? Someone who wouldn't make demands?

Sakura cleared her throat. "Eh... have you already got someone in mind Syaoran?" she asked timidly. "Maybe an old high-school girlfriend?"

"I don't have any female acquaintances." he bit out. "I only maintain my friendship with my male acquaintances. Women are good for..." he fell silent, closed his eyes for a moment and apologized. "I'm sorry Sakura. The answer to your question is no."

"We're supposed to be friends," she mumbled.

He looked at her surprised. "What does that have to do with this?"

"I'm willing to do it Syaoran. Marry you, pretend I mean. To help you keep custody."

"No!" he almost shouted.

"Why not? I wouldn't demand anything. We can set up some arrangements. We have our own lives to live, but we have to live under one roof. Well until aunt Mitsumi backs off..."

"Are you deaf?" Syaoran grabbed her hard at the shoulders. "I said-"

"Dad! We're done!" Hao's yell from the shore startled them both. Syaoran abruptly let go of Sakura. Sakura lost her balance and fell in the water, causing the water to splash around her.

When she came up spluttering she saw Syaoran looking at her. His face was tensed. "I didn't mean that Sakura," he said. "Are you okay?"

Sakura kept her head above water. "Think about it," she said. "You've got till midnight." she raised one hand to wipe the water from her face. Now that she could see batter she saw that Syaoran was looking rather pale. "I'm your only option Syaoran, but remember this: I'm doing this for Hao, not his father." and with that she began to swim back to the shore. Turning around she said one last thing: Because you're the last person on earth I want to marry!"

* * *

Around two o'clock Mei Lin came home. When Sakura heard Mei Lin went to the doctor she became upset.

"To the doctor?" she cried out. "Why did you go to the doctor?"

Mei Lin wrung her hands and sat down. "Can you please get me a glass of water?"

Obediently Sakura got a glass and filled it with water. She gave the glass to Mei Lin, who took a few sips gratefully.

"Now, will you tell me what's wrong?" she asked.

Mei Lin put the glass on the table. "You know how my stomach bothered me," she started, "So I asked Tomoyo to bring me to the doctor this morning. And it seems... well... I'm pregnant." Mei Lin avoided Sakura's gaze and Sakura just gaped at her.

"P-pregnant?" she stuttered. "How? I mean..."

Mei Lin looked up at her and suddenly Sakura understood.

"Hiroshi"

Mei Lin just nodded. "I want to keep the baby." she said.

"But why didn't you call me yesterday? I could've gone to the doctor with you.

"I thought about it," Mei Lin admitted, "but then you called to say you were busy."

Sakura felt guilty. If she wasn't so set in avoiding Syaoran this wouldn't have happened.

"I'm sorry Mei Lin. If I had known..."

"I know." Mei Lin cut her off. "That's why I didn't call you. I don't want you to worry too much. I'll figure out what I'll do. Oh and there's another thing. We were supposed to go out for dinner tonight. I really don't feel like it today."

"I understand. I'll cancel our reservation at Cherry's Lodge."

"No, that won't be necessary." Mei Lin quickly replied, "I just talked to Syaoran and he agreed to take you there. He'll pick you up at seven. Don't worry about Hao. He's going to stay at Tomoyo's place." Mei Lin stood up. "I'll go take a nap now. The doctor said I shouldn't tire myself out too much."

Sakura opened her mouth to protest but Mei Lin was faster. "And I shouldn't be exciting myself, he said. Stress is not healthy for the baby." she said. And then she walked away, with a merry twinkle in her eyes.

Sakura muttered something under her breath that sounded suspiciously like "shit" and heard giggling in the hall. Mei Lin was having a great time again. Trust her to turn shocking news into her advantage. It still amazed Sakura how she could switch moods so easily like the push of a button. And now she cooked up a plan that involved her and Syaoran to go dining together, in the hopes of getting them together.

What would she say if she found out that Sakura had proposed to marry Syaoran? And was rejected...

* * *

At exactly seven o'clock Syaoran came to pick up Sakura. She and Mei Lin were sitting outside. Mei Lin was busy putting the flowers, picked by Hao, into a vase.

"Because you're pregnant." he mumbled, blushing.

"He's a darling of a child and has much love to give. He's just waiting for the right person to give it to." Mei Lin said when they heard footsteps.

As usual Sakura was taken by surprise at the way Syaoran looked. He was wearing a navy-blue suit with a dress-shirt. His belt had a shining silver clasp, vesting her attention on his small hips. Quickly she looked away.

One look at his face told Sakura that Syaoran desired her too.

His voice, however, held a mocking tone. Smiling he shook his head and said: "What happened to the girl with the scraped knees and dirty face?"

Sakura was wearing one of Tomoyo's creations. A black evening-gown with silver threads woven in between. Whenever she moved the dress shimmered silver. She knew she rarely looked better than this but Syaorans ironic gaze made her feel immature.

"That girl?" she said dryly, "She disappeared. Only her viciousness remained. It comes in handy when you're around."

Syaoran laughed and looked at his watch. "We'd best be going now if we want to drink something before dinner. Are you ready Sakura?"

Sakura stood up and said: "Well I guess I'll be off then. Bye Mei Lin."

"Have a good time." Mei replied.

As they walked away to Syaoran's car, Mei Lin looked at them thinking.

"Well," she said to the air, "I've done my part. Let's hope it works out."

**TBC**  
A/N: Well that's it for chapter 11. I've decided to make an entire different chapter for what was supposed to be chapter 11B. So 11B will now be known as chapter 12. And Chapter 12 will describe how the date went...and more. That's all I'll tell you! Right, now I'll write chapter 12 and continue bitching about how mom threw my chapter away!


	12. chapter 12

A/N 2007: Okay, by now, if you've been reading all the 2007 notes, you should know the drill ;) Changed the name Caryssa to Xueli, which sounds way more Chinese.

A/N: Hello people! When you read this I'll be on vacation :P Yes I still have vacation but when I come back I'll have to go to school again. Anyway, my ever so sweet editor is back and she was nice enough to post this chapter for me. Otherwise you'd all be waiting even longer for it. Well I hope you enjoy this chapter as well and Thanks for all the reviews!

**Chapter 12**

The Lodge was crowded with people and smelled like expensive perfume and cigars. Syaoran pulled Sakura out of the way when some people wanted to pass. It didn't escape Sakura's notice that every woman casted a side-way glance at Syaoran. He didn't seem to notice though. With his hand on her elbow he led her through the crowd to a table close by the windows. Even here Syaoran drew everyone's attention.

'No wonder' Sakura thought, 'he's the most handsome guy here in the room.'

Sakura wasn't paying attention to her surroundings and was startled when somebody stopped them before they reached their table.

"Li Syaoran?" a man with grey hair and blue eyes looked searchingly at Syaoran. "You probably don't recognize me but-"

"Of course I do! Hu Li Min, my fathers High-school friend."

Both men shook hands laughing. Sakura just watched. The way Hu dressed screamed money. The suit was definitely an Armani and his tie was made of pure expensive silk.

"It's great to see you again, Li Min." Syaoran looked at Sakura. "Sakura this is Hu Li Min, Li Min, this is Kinomoto Sakura. She and Mei Lin own the cottage next to mine.

Li Min shook Sakura's hand. "It's always a pleasure to meet a pretty young woman like you." His eyes sparkled, "Even at my age."

"Li Min and dad grew up together." Syaoran explained.

"Indeed." Li Min agreed, "Ah, look. Here comes the love of my life."

Sakura followed his gaze, saw a woman with chestnut-coloured hair wearing a fuchsia-coloured dress coming their way and gasped softly. Li Min was at least 60 and the woman, wearing a dress bordering on scandalous, wasn't older than 30.

The woman's eyes looked at Sakura indifferently and then settled on Syaoran. Her demeanour changed immediately, albeit subtly, after seeing Syaoran.

"Well, well," she said in a sultry tone. "Li Syaoran, my first crush. How are you?" She practically fell on him trying to hug him.

"Hello Xueli."

Xueli dragged his head down and kissed him soundly on the lips, while pressing her body flush against his. It looked like she was trying to absorb Syaoran. Sakura was getting uncomfortable. That woman was married for god sakes and Syaoran didn't seem to mind the attention she was paying him. Carefully she glanced at Li Min, but he was looking at it with a tolerant smile.

"Darling," he finally said, "Let me talk to Syaoran for a moment now."

"Daddy," Xueli all but whined, "It's just boring business." she pouted and grabbed Syaoran's arm, hugging it to her chest.

'Daddy, so they aren't married' Sakura thought, 'And Syaoran is that woman's first love. How romantic.' Sakura hoped her aversion of Xueli wasn't too noticeable when Li Min introduced her.

"Sakura, this is my daughter Xueli. You can see I've spoiled her rotten, but she's all I have after my wife died. Xueli, this is Syaoran's friend, Sakura Kinomoto.

"Pleasure," Xueli mumbled, still looking at Syaoran. "Sweetie, tell daddy what you've been up to these last few years." she continued looking at him as if hypnotised and her grip on his arm tightened possessively.

Sakura concentrated on what Li Min had to say and from time to time she commented here and there.

"Sakura..." Syaoran was talking to her and she looked up at him. "It's time if we want to drink something before dinner." he said looking at his watch.

Li Min nodded and shook Syaoran's hand. "It's a shame we can't eat together. Syaoran, I'll call you. Tomorrow or the day after. I've got an assignment for you since you're planning to move back here."

Xueli caressed Syaoran's arm and looked at him from under her eyelashes. "Come and visit us soon, darling..." she breathed.

Sakura wanted to walk to their table as soon as the Hu's were gone but Syaoran stopped her.

"The table will wait - let's get a drink at the bar first. Sorry about that," was all he said.

Sakura shrugged. "I wouldn't have wanted to miss that little... meeting." she claimed, "Very interesting to see the kind of women you used to hang out with." She plucked the handkerchief out of his pocket, smiled and wiped two purple streaks of lipstick off of his mouth. "That's better. She gave him his handkerchief back and walked towards the bar. "Believe me," she said looking over her shoulder. "Purple doesn't suit you."

* * *

An hour and a half later, after a delicious dinner Syaoran was drinking a cup of coffee and looked at Sakura. Sakura flinched inwardly, but managed to keep herself calm outwardly. During dinner they hardly spoke, which was her fault. Syaoran tried more than once to start a conversation.

"I think you're sulking." His eyes glittered teasingly.

"Am I wrong or is it because Xueli gave me a kiss?"

"Kiss?" Sakura glared at him. "Why should I care if you go embarrass yourself with that woman?"

He leaned back in his chair and studied her face. "Well if that isn't troubling you then-" he fell silent and frowned at something or someone behind her, while sitting up in his chair again.

Sakura opened her mouth to ask what was wrong when she felt two hands covering her eyes.

"Guess who?" the man said in his light baritone voice. Sakura recognised the voice immediately.

"Jimmy!" she pulled his hands away, smiling. She hadn't seen him in two years. He moved away to Tokyo and in those two years he hadn't changed a bit. She jumped off her seat and he gave her a hug. "What a nice surprise!" she beamed.

"Indeed." he agreed, his indigo eyes sparkling as he laid his hand on her waist. "You're prettier than ever." he praised and gave her a kiss.

When he pulled back there was a discreet cough. Sakura looked back and saw Syaoran standing closer to her than she expected, looking far from happy.

"Oh Jimmy, let me introduce you to Li Syaoran. Syaoran, Jimmy Bemmel." The men shook each other's hands. "Jimmy, why don't you stay and drink a cup of coffee with us?"

"I wish I could," he said regretfully, "but I'm here with my brother. We're here to pick up his wife." he raked a hand through his blonde hair. 'But I would love to talk to you again. I'm moving back here."

"Why don't you call me when you're done with moving? I still live in that apartment you last saw."

"Great, I'll you then to set up a date." Jimmy grabbed her shoulders, pressed a quick kiss on her forehead and waved goodbye to her and Syaoran, disappearing into the crowd.

Sakura sat back down in her seat and sighed. "It's great that he's back. I've missed him." from the corner of her eye she saw Syaoran frowning again.

"If the guy's so great, then why did you let him go? What was the problem? Syaoran balled his hands into fists.

Sakura looked at him, taken aback. "What?" she asked when suddenly it dawned on her and she giggled. Confused and getting angrier by the second Syaoran asked: "What's so funny?"

"You," Sakura answered between her giggles. "Jimmy was never my boyfriend. He's already married."

Stunned and embarrassed Syaoran replied with a witty "Oh" and his ears became pink. Seeing Syaoran's face made Sakura laugh even harder.

"If only Mei Lin could se us now" she gasped.

Syaoran's face changed from the stunned expression to an amused one and he chuckled. "No doubt that she would pour this all over us." he held the cup of coffee merrily in the air.

The laughing broke the tension that was hanging between them this evening. Syaoran ordered another cup of coffee for the both of them and the evening was spent chatting about books, movies and other trivial things.

Finally Sakura looked at her watch. "It's getting late. We'd better head back." she sighed. Together they walked to the car and Syaoran drove them both back to the cottages.

The night was beautiful, the stars shining bright and the moon clear in the sky. It reminded Sakura of a fairytale.

"Sakura..." Syaoran's soft whisper brought her back.

"Yeah?" she turned her head towards him a soft smile on her lips.

Syaoran swallowed. She looked so beautiful with the moon illuminating her.

"About your proposal..."

"What about it?" She had half forgotten the proposal, the evening being much too nice to remember it.

Syaoran stuck his hands in his pockets. "I accept." was simply said, his face turned away from her.

"What?" Sakura wasn't sure she heard it right. "What do you mean Syaoran?"

"We're getting married."

A cool breeze began to blow and Sakura shivered. Unconsciously she began to rub her arms. Syaoran took off his coat and put it on her.

"You're cold" he mumbled. The coat was still warm and smelled like him. Sakura pulled the coat tighter around her.

"Thanks."

Syaoran wiped a few auburn locks out of her face. "You said I had 'till midnight" he continued, "and according to my watch I still have two minutes left." he looked at his watch, "Well, one minute now. Sakura... you seem kind of... shocked. Have you... you haven't changed your mind, I hope. Sakura?"

"No, no I haven't." she managed to squeeze out of her constricted throat as they walked further towards her cottage. Another silence descended upon them, but this time it wasn't an amiable one and Sakura broke it quickly.

"We'll have to make plans" she said softly.

"We also have to tell Mei Lin."

"I'll tell her and explain everything."

Syaoran nodded. "But the others don't have to know."

"So what do we tell them? That we suddenly fell in love with each other?"

"Everyone will probably think that. I'll talk to Hao first thing in the morning. He probably has to get used to the idea but I don't see any trouble. He likes you a lot. If it's okay with you I think we should get married as soon as possible."

"I agree. That way we'll be able to get ahead of aunt Mitsumi."

"Would you like a small wedding?"

Suddenly the enormity of it all came crashing down on Sakura. She was going to marry Syaoran!

"Sakura, I asked you if you wanted a small wedding?"

Startled out of her reverie she exclaimed: "No!" at Syaoran's surprised stare she continued: "Not entirely. I mean I'm only going to marry once, and I want it to be perfect. I want my friends to see it. And I want to marry in white."

Syaoran's eyebrows rose, but he stayed silent.

"You know white is the colour for virgins..." he remarked after a while.

It was dark so Syaoran couldn't see the flash of pain in Sakura's eyes.

"It's my wedding, Syaoran and I want to wear white."

"Alright. So it's going to be a real wedding. Sakura... Just out of curiosity. What do you gain out of this marriage?"

'The bittersweet luck of seeing you everyday,' she thought, ' Lonely sleepless nights when I'm crying, wanting you, but can't have you. Your love...'

"A son who is very sweet," she replied, "Nothing more I guess. I'll have my own work, my own friends. Everything that's precious to me, I want to keep. Though I suppose I'll have to give up my apartment... I presume you want to live in a house with your family."

"A house?" he echoed, "Why not a home, Sakura?"

"A home is different," she whispered, "It cannot be bought, no one can built it. A home comes forth from love."

"I love my son." His eyes glittered bright in the dark.

"But you don't like me," she stated. "So no matter how much Hao and I will love each other, there will always be a gap between us. That's why our house will never become a home."

They arrived at Sakura's cottage and as if agreed they stayed under the branched of the old willow tree.

"It's not that I don't like you Sakura," Syaoran said softly. " I... I have something against the way you sometimes behave. So once we're married," he grabbed her shoulders, and to Sakura's amazement, she felt his fingers trembling. "It's going to be a real wedding, Sakura. Our house will become a home and... and I won't allow you to see other men."

"What?" Sakura slapped his hands away and backed up against the tree. "I thought I said that this was only in name? I'm doing this for Hao! And don't think you can keep me away from my friends either!"

Syaoran angrily slammed his hands on both sides of Sakura's head, against the tree.

"As I said: It will be a real wedding! I expect your loyalty and you'll get mine in return. And believe me, after the vows I'll make sure you keep your end of the bargain."

He cupped her face and slowly brought his closer to kiss her. The kiss was fierce, gentle, possessive and above all intimate.

When Syaoran pulled away Sakura's lips were swollen and their breathing was heavy.

"Remember Sakura. When we marry you will be mine and no one else's." and with that he walked away to his own cottage, leaving Sakura stunned.

Still leaning against the tree, she slid to the ground. "What have I gotten myself into?" she whispered to the sky and snuggled deeper into Syaoran's coat.

**TBC**  
Well folks, that's all for now. I'll continue it when I get back from vacation. I think I really deserved it, because during the whole vacation I've been working my ass off! My editor will vouch for me . Anyway, please leave a review! Thank you people!


	13. chapter 13

A/N 2007: I think I got most of the errors and stuff out. And I'm totally aware of what was going on in my story again D Right now, I've already started on chapter 14, so I'm hoping to be able to put it up in the next two weeks (but no promises!)

A/N: Eheheheh...sweatdrops I can't possibly explain this urm... late update... looks nervously at the readers who are left Eh... have fun reading? hides behind the dustbins

**Chapter 13**

The next morning, during breakfast, Sakura told Mei Lin the whole story. Mei Lin didn't seem surprised.

"Thank God," she said with a sly smile.

As if she had something to do with it, Sakura thought surprised.

"I told you, you three look like a family," Mei Lin continued, "and I always thought that you two were destined for each other."

"But it isn't going to be a real marriage. It's just for Hao."

"Don't give me that crap. I've seen how Syaoran looks at you. If that isn't going to be a real marriage... What I'm trying to say is: I know my cousin and I just know he loves you." Sakura opened her mouth to protest but Mei Lin raised her hand. "And don't tell me I'm wrong! You might not believe it but give it some time."

Sakura nodded and kept her feelings to herself. Mei Lin wouldn't understand it. She never did.

* * *

Syaoran came by with Hao and after Mei Lin had congratulated them he said: "Well, Hao. Tell aunt Sakura what you told me when you heard we were going to get married."

Hao pushed his glasses back up. "I said that I kinda like it." he mumbled.

"Was that all?" Syaoran asked him teasingly, "you kinda like it?"

Hao shuffled shyly with his feet. "That I kinda like it," he mumbled again, " and if you could hurry up with marrying each other."

"Oh Hao," Sakura kneeled in front of him and gave him a hug, "It'll happen soon," she promised, "and I kinda like it too, you know."

Hao hugged Sakura back before they let go of each other again. Mei Lin asked if he would like some soda. Hao nodded and went to sit at the kitchen table. Sakura stood up again and turned towards Syaoran. He was looking at her with a strange look. Did he notice the tears glistering in her eyes?

"Morning," she mumbled.

"Hello Sakura," he closed what little distance there was between them and gave her a kiss on the lips. His lips tasted sweet and fresh, and his fingers were caressing her cheek, wiping the stray locks behind her ear. Sakura swallowed the lump in her throat. She heard Mei Lin asking if Syaoran wanted some coffee.

When Syaoran and Hao finished their drinks, Syaoran stood up and excused themselves. "I promised Mamoru and Hao that we're going sailing today," he explained, "and teach them how to fish." he looked at Sakura smiling, "I would take you with us but this is a guy thing."

"Good, because Sakura and I are going to town to have a 'girl thing'." Mei Lin answered and shoved the guys playfully out of the cottage.

* * *

It was well after noon when Mei Lin and Sakura returned. Mei Lin went inside and Sakura walked towards the beach, after parking the car. With her hand raised to shield her eyes against the bright sun she scanned the water. Syaoran's boat wasn't in sight, but she expected him to return within half an hour. She walked back to the cottage. Mei Lin had changed her clothes and was currently busy getting the chicken dish out of the oven that Sakura put in earlier.

"My, it smells delicious!" Mei Lin praised, "I feel a lot better today and I'm starving!"

"Well what are you waiting for then?" Sakura asked, while setting the table, "I made this especially for you so dig in."

"Don't need to tell me twice!" Mei Lin fished a spoon out of one of the drawers and scooped her plate full, before giving the spoon to Sakura. And together they ate in comfortable silence.

After washing the dishes Sakura was peering out of the window in the kitchen and saw Syaoran's boat. She hung the drying cloth on a peg and asked Mei Lin: "Are you really feeling better?"

"Yes, I feel fine." Mei Lin smiled.

"Would you mind me going home then? So much has happened this weekend and I need to think..."

"I don't mind, but I don't know what Syaoran might say."

Sakura shrugged. "If he has problems he'll just have to call me." she mumbled.

"Are you coming next weekend?" Mei Lin wanted to know.

"I'm not sure... There's still a lot to do."

"Well I know that Tomoyo has a dress for you, so that's one less thing to worry about. Can I do anything to help?" Mei Lin asked eagerly, "I can do the catering! I know this wonderful caterer! her name is Yui. And she's really good!"

Sakura laughed. "Fine, you can do the catering if you like.

"It wont be easy though," Mei Lin sighed, "To prepare everything in four weeks."

"Don't worry. We'll get it done. Four weeks will be enough."

* * *

On Thursday afternoon Syaoran appeared suddenly at Sakura's school. Sakura was sitting behind her desk, grading her student's papers when he knocked on the door and entered. She dropped her pen on the desk and immediately asked where Hao was.

"Home, meaning the cottage with the nanny." Syaoran answered leaning casually against the doorframe.

"Oh, I didn't know you would hire her so soon."

"She started on Monday and she loves it."

"That's good to hear." she picked her pen up again and continued grading the papers." It's nice of you to stop by," she began without looking up, "but I still have a lot to do. I never knew there would be so much to take care of. Of course Mei Lin and Tomoyo are helping, but the church is booked 'till November. And the reception, well-"

Syaoran stopped her nervous stream of words and walked towards her desk. "That's why I've taken care of something. I've been looking for a house and I think I've found one that both of us and Hao will like. we should go take a look."

"Can't it wait?" Sakura pushed her hair behind her ear, still not looking up. "I don't really have the time and I'm sure your choice is good enough."

"Sakura, don't start to panic."

"I'm not!" Her voice trembled treacherously.

Syaoran laid his hand above hers, stopping her from writing further. "Yes you are. Come on. This won't take long." Syaoran grabbed her purse standing on the desk. "Just a few hours, that's all."

Sakura finally looked up at him and he smiled at her charmingly. How could she refuse that smile? Sakura agreed. "Alright, just a few hours." she repeated.

* * *

The house was situated in Yadori, a few miles away from Tomoeda. It was made out of red bricks and was two stories high. The woodwork was painted salmon, and the front garden was full of colour. A sea of wild flowers gave the garden a red and purple glow with an occasional white dot in it. The path that led toward the front door curved its way through the ocean of colour. Sakura immediately fell in love with the house.

The real estate agent waited patiently for the two of them to make their way through the garden to the front door.

"Shall we go in?" she asked.

The two of them nodded and the real estate agent opened the impressive oak doors. They creaked, but not in an eerie way. The sound gave the house an aura of cosiness.

"You might have heard of Makiko Suzuhara," she started.

"You mean the interior decorator?" Sakura walked into the front parlour and awed at the carvings.

"Yes. She decorated the whole place. It stood in the last issue of 'Home Style', with picture and all."

"No wonder it looks so familiar," Sakura breathed.

"Yes, she was planning on living here herself, but for some unknown reason she decided to sell it. Rumour is that her boyfriend broke up with her." the real estate agent winked at her, "Either way, we've got a lot of admirers for this house." The real estate agent showed them around in the house, taking them from room to room and explaining and answering the questions the couple had. The tour ended in the main bedroom.

"This concludes the tour," she said, "Please, take your time if you want to look around the house again. I'll wait downstairs."

Sakura looked around and cleared her throat shyly when she spotted the bed. She walked towards the window and gasped at the view it gave.

Syaoran went to stand behind her and laid his hands lightly on her hips. "Look there..." he pointed, "it's the ideal spot for the ceremony and on that lawn nearby the pool, we can have the reception in a large tent with a dance floor. Isn't this the perfect place for a wedding, Sakura?"

"Yeah," she sighed dreamily. A perfect place. But as long as Syaoran didn't change his opinion about her, it would never be the perfect marriage. He said he liked her but that was just because he had no choice. He had to marry her or lose Hao. She knew it and blinked away her tears.

Syaoran pulled her in his arms and let his chin rest on her head. "Do you like it?" he asked.

Yes, she loved being in his arms! "Yes," she said softly, "but will you be able to buy it this quickly? I mean with all the contracts and stuff..." she could feel his heart beat against her back.

"It will be okay..." his grip on her tightened for a second. "I'm looking forward to finally get what I want... the sooner the better."

Sakura closed her eyes - the way he said those words, made it clear that he wasn't talking about the house... Once they were married she needed to make it clear to him that they wouldn't make love, or have sex at all.

She shivered, pushed his hands off her and took a few steps away from him. "It's a lovely house, Syaoran." she had trouble speaking, "If you really want it, it's okay with me. Shall we take a look at the garden?"

* * *

That evening Syaoran called Sakura to tell her that the buy was made - they could move in next Monday. Sakura listened to him like a lifeless doll. Soon, her old life would be over and she would start a new one. A new one with Syaoran and Hao.

Would she ever fit in? She wondered. Would she win Syaoran's heart? Or would they forever be cold and formal to each other? These questions plagued her mind as she went to bed that evening. And in the comfort of her apartment, she wished she never made that promise. And her last thought of that evening was: 'If only I had never met Syaoran...'

**TBC**  
Well, I know this is chapter is short, but I thought to update again. Better something than nothing at all right? Well I'll try to update this vacation again but I can't promise anything ; I'm a real lazy person, not to mention slow ; And I know there are probably a LOT of mistakes now, because it's been so long since I've updated. I will get them out eventually(I think). But first I wanna finish the story. Anyway tell me what you think.


	14. chapter 14

A/N 2007: So finally, after waiting for more than two years, the next chapter has come out. Originally this was to become a part chapter 13, so that's why it's kind of on the short side (not that my other chapters were long).

Also, **question **to the readers: do youthink I should change the rating from T to M? I've been doubting myself if I've rated this fic correctly or not...

I wonder if there are any old fans of this story? Ah well, to the old fans: thank you for being so patient and to the new readers: enjoy )

**Chapter 14**

As the day of the wedding approached Sakura become more and more nervous. Both Tomoyo and Mei Lin had to calm her down on the actual day, neither of them succeeding in it.

"Sakura, stop it! I can hardly do your makeup with you moving around like this!" Mei Lin sighed exasperated.

"I'm sorry, I can't help it. It's just… Oh, I don't know." Sakura fiddled with the lace of her wedding dress, then decided that it would ruin the dress if she fiddled some more with it and switched to tangling and untangling her fingers.

"Don't worry your head of, Sakura. If you do that, there's bound to be something to go wrong. Just take it as it comes." Tomoyo smiled warmly at Sakura, while rearranging the veil on Sakura's head.

A knock on the door and someone saying "fifteen minutes left," reminded them to speed things up a little bit.

Sakura took deep breaths and braced herself for what was to come: her marriage to Syaoran. She waited restlessly for the fifteen minutes to pass. And when the knock came again, she thought the fifteen minutes had passed all too soon.

The door opened and Rika popped her head through the opening. "It's time Sakura. Let's go."

Again Sakura took some deep breaths. She stood up, and staggered a bit when she took the first couple of steps, but managed no to fall.

"Okay, let's do it."

* * *

The wedding went smoothly. And before Sakura knew it, it was already over. Now, she was standing at the reception of her own wedding, with Syaoran next to her, accepting the congratulations of friends and family. 

After all the congratulations, both started to mingle separately under the guests.

"So how does it feel to be married?" Naoko asked Sakura.

"Unreal," Sakura answered honestly. "It still hasn't really gotten through to me that I'm actually married." she laughed.

Sakura was beginning to relax. Being around her friends made it so much easier for her and she was fully enjoying her self. It surprised her that the time had passed so quickly. It was already nine in the evening when Syaoran was once again by her side.

"Let's go," his voice sounded tense en the hand that caressed her back seemed to burn through her dress. Sakura started to panick.

"We're going?" she repeated, her voice trembling a little.

He grabbed her wrist gently, but firm. "Yes, it's about time." He said looking at her meaningfully.

"Alright then." Sakura blushed and looked around her. "I wonder where Tomoyo is," she chattered, "She said she'd help me get changed and wrap my wedding dress up because…"

Syaoran touched the delicate lace around her neck. "Is this your mother's wedding dress?" he asked. His fingers caressed her neckline and she felt her desire for him grow.

"Yes," she whispered, "Tomoyo's mother kept it for my sake and made a few adjustments."

"She would've been proud of you today. You were a beautiful bride, Sakura."

People around them were talking and laughing. Sakura felt like she was on a whole different planet together with Syaoran. "Thank you." She mumbled, and as if her head had a will of its own, it turned to Syaoran.

"Sakura, did I hear it right? Are you planning to leave already?" Tomoyo's voice penetrated the haze Sakura was feeling.

Syaoran's warm hand slid off her neck, touching her arm lightly. "Yes, we're about ready." He confirmed.

* * *

The sapphire-coloured cocktail dress with a matching shawl as well as a necklace and bracelet were already laid out on the bed for Sakura. The weather was warm, so she wouldn't be needing a coat. 

The rustling of paper and closet doors opening and closing brought Sakura back to reality: they were in the bedroom, the bedroom she'd be sharing with Syaoran. And she was busy changing her clothes.

There was a soft knock on the door before it opened. Tomoyo stepped into the bedroom. She looked Sakura over with an approving stare. "You look beautiful," she said satisfied. "Now, if you're done looking at your ring, let's go to that dashing husband of yours."

"He really is dashing isn't he?" She sighed.

"Yes he is, but you're not bad looking yourself either." It was a beautiful wedding. You guys really pulled off a good job in such a short time!"

"I couldn't have done it without your or Mei Lin's help though. You two really helped out with the catering and dresses. And Syaoran and I were lucky to buy this house with furniture."

An amiable silence fell between them as they slowly walked down the stairs. After some time, as they neared the end of the stairs, Tomoyo began to speak. "You know, you really do look pretty. I guess, you're about to leave."

Sakura nodded. "I dawdled a bit with changing my clothes," she confessed, "Syaoran is outside with Mei Lin I assume?"

They walked further along, but Tomoyo stood still halfway in the hallway. She looked at Sakura and grabbed her hands. "I'm glad to be able to talk to you about this in private," she said, "Eriol and I are glad you and Syaoran talked it out, about what really happened eight years ago at the cottage."

"Syaoran still doesn't know," Sakura confessed tonelessly.

Tomoyo looked at Sakura, surprise clearly written in her eyes. "What? Why didn't you tell Syaoran that it was Misha who was fooling around with Eriol? Is he still thinking you- " she silenced herself abruptly, and paled when she saw who was standing behind Sakura. "Syaoran," she choked out.

How long was he standing there? Apparantly he'd been waiting at the library for Sakura, so he was only a few feet away. It meant that he had heard everything…

Sakura felt as if a cold and imposing hand was laid on her back. She didn't want to turn around, but she had no choice.

"Syaoran," she whispered. All her strength left her. She staggered and sought support at the walls.

Syaoran's face was pale, his face was tense, but he didn't look at Sakura – his eyes were fixed on Tomoyo. His voice sounded like it came from far away. "You're saying it was Misha and not Sakura who had…" the words wouldn't come out of his mouth.

"Tomoyo looked at Sakura pleadingly, closed her eyes for one moment and then stared straight into Syaoran's eyes. "Yes" she answered. "It was Misha. She followed Eriol to the beach and forced herself on him. Sakura happened to be in the neighbourhood. She was taking a stroll on the beach because she couldn't sleep thanks to the heat." Tomoyo swallowed.

Syaoran rubbed his eyes tiredly with his hand. He looked at Sakura like he had never seen her before. As if she was a stranger he didn't wish to know. His voice sounded pained when he asked: "Why didn't you tell me before?"

Sakura had to swallow a few times, trying to get the lump out of her throat. "You never asked…" she whispered, trying to blink her tears away. It didn't help – the tears leaked out of her eyes, finding a way down her face.

"Sakura, I'm sorry… I know.." Tomoyo started.

But Sakura cut her off, "It's okay Tomoyo. It's not your fault."

Tomoyo let her breath escape and took a quick glance at Sakura's face as well as Syaoran's. Feeling the uncomfortable silence she hastily said: "Well… I'll be going then…" and walked away with quick steps, her heels echoing in the hallway with each step.

Sakura was the first to speak after Tomoyo left. " Syaoran, I-"

Syaoran didn't let Sakura finish. "Don't," he said and grabbed her by her arm. Sakura wasn't used to this rough treatment and practically got dragged along with him. This was the first time he didn't take her small steps into account.

"We'll talk about this later in private" he ground out. "First we're heading towards the cottage. It's still a damned long way from here."

**TBC**  
So the secret's finally out. Did anyone think I rushed it? I'm still trying to get the hang of the new system here at and the layout of the story still kinda sucks (but I'm too lazy to fix that, sorry.) Ah well, comments and criticism are always appreciated


End file.
